Page 66 of Kiss, Kill, Thrill Me, Daddy

I nod. “I know.”

He cups my cheek. “I’m afraid I will not get to spend the night with you.”

My eyes widen, because the thought of spending a night without him next to me feels impossible. Illogical. “Why not?”

“I cannot see you before the rehearsal. Tradition, little one. It’s bad luck.”

“That’s not a tradition.”

“Perhaps not, but after everything we’ve gone through to get here, I do not wish to take any chances.” His lips touch mine, and I can taste remnants of myself on his tongue. When he breaks the kiss, he kneels in front of me, kissing my cockhead. “I will miss you, my little one’s little friend. Be a good boy for me and do not ejaculate again.” He looks up at me. “Tomorrow night, I will make you come again, but not a moment before. Understood?”

His request is ridiculous, but that doesn’t stop me from saying, “Yeah. Okay, Abi.”

CHAPTER 13

TATUM

“God dammit, Tatum. I’ve told you at least a dozen times; I walk down the aisle first.” My biffle Scotty stomps the final four paces separating us and drives his finger into my chest. “I’m not going to say this again: this is my big day, and I’m not letting you steal the show.”

We’ve been standing in the entryway of Harmony Baptist Church for the last twenty minutes, waiting to be told it’s time for us to make our entrance. Honestly, the venue choice is one that offends me to my very core. Brody didn’t seem terribly fond of the idea either, but once Scotty reminded him it’s the church his mother attended as a child, he quickly changed his tune. When the pastor refused to host a homosexual wedding, both Brody and Abi paid him a little visit, and he’s been quiet as a church mouse ever since.

“I’m not stealing anything, you salty son of a bitch,” I hiss. “I was peeking out the door to see if they’re ready for us. Jesus Christ, why must everything be a battle with you?”

“I’ll give you a battle,” he growls. “Now shut up and walk me down the aisle.” He approaches like a tidal wave, stomping his way toward me. Once he’s at my side, he closes his eyes anddraws in a deep breath. “I breathe in love.” He takes another deep breath and lets it out slowly. “I exhale light.” I don’t know what the fuckthat’sabout, but I don’t care for the new-age bullshit. Then again, I worship a reality television icon, so who am I to judge? When he opens his eyes, he turns and eyes me up and down. “Your outfit is stupid.”

He probably has a point. Ever since my date with Abi, I’ve been itching to slide into my see-through shirt. I really enjoyed having a fabulous cape to fling about. It makes me feel like a Hollywood starlet walking down the red carpet. For pants, I chose sheer leggings that leave little to the imagination. Like the shirt, they’re basically translucent. You can see my banana-yellow jock through the fabric and everything.

“This is why no one likes you,” Bennet says, folding his arms over his chest. Bennet and Benji look adorable in their matching outfits. I almost want to ask if they’re willing to wear them to the wedding. They’ve both got on blue-and-white checkered shorts that fit in all the right places. Having seen them naked, I know what lies beneath. While neither have much to write home about—Benji especially—their smaller-than-average penises fit them perfectly. And Goddess help you when they turn around. “Booty for days” doesn’t even begin to describe them.

Scotty scowls at Bennet. “People don’t like me because my dad threatened to kill every gay person in America if he won the presidential election.” A smirk curls on his face, and he takes a threatening step toward Bennet. “We see how that ended, didn’t we? Keep it up and he won’t be the only one swimming with the fishes.” He pulls his hand out of his pocket, and there’s something in his grip that sparkles against the light. For fuck’s sake, how the hell did he manage to wedge garden shears in his skin-tight slacks? Ridiculous. Everything about this is ridiculous.

“You don’t scare me,” Bennet says matter-of-factly. “And people don’t hate you because of your dad. We hate you because you’re a prick.”

Scotty stomps forward and pokes his finger into Bennet’s chest. “Just wait until I tell Daddy what you said. He’s gonna get you, Bennet. He’s gonna get you real good.”

Bennet slaps Scotty’s hand away and sighs. “Bored now. Fuck off.” He turns to Benji, who’s now shaking like a leaf thanks to Scotty’s threats. Bennet places a hand on Benji’s chest and nods. “Breathe in.” Like a good boy, Benji follows his friend’s instruction, closing his eyes and inhaling for a five count. Once it’s done, Bennet says, “Good, baby. Now, out.”

Benji exhales slowly, and when his eyes open, all the worry and fear is gone. I don’t know how Bennet manages to pull him back so easily, but I’m pretty sure Benji would follow Bennet over a cliff if he asked him to.

As they console each other, Scotty and I make eye contact. Though he’s just threatened Bennet’s life, even he can’t mask the subtle smile he’s trying to hide away.

“You ready, Scotty?” I ask, squeezing his hand, but he doesn’t answer me. He just stares ahead at the door. “It’s just a rehearsal. You don’t have anything to be worried about.”

“I know,” he agrees. “That’s not what ... I mean, I’m just—” Closing his eyes, he lets out a loud groan like he hates everything in the world. “Thank you, Tater Tot.”

“For what?”

He rolls his eyes. “For going along with all this. For not hating me after I stole your license and got married on your behalf. A lot of people would be mad.”

“Oh, no. Make no mistake. I’m fucking livid with you.” I wait until the worry settles on his face before leaning closer and bumping his shoulder. “But I still love you.” He nods, his eyes a little mistier than before, and holds out a pinkie for me. I wrap my finger around it and tug. “Biffles for life?”

“Biffles for always.” Another squeeze, and he turns and looks ahead. I do the same, staring at the closed doors, trying to steady my racing heart. I know this is only a practice run, but thethought of walking down the aisle toward Abi sends my stomach fluttering beneath my skin. To my surprise, Scotty slides his hand into mine and squeezes.

“Thank you for doing this with me,” he says, his voice quiet but coated in affection. “I love you.”

My heart swells in my chest, and I grip his hand even tighter. “I love you, too.”

The next thing I know, Scotty’s leg is in the air, and he kicks the swinging doors to the chapel wide-open, startling everyone in the room ahead. It’s an action he clearly hasn’t thought through, because the door simply swings back and strikes him in the face, making him cry out in pain. I close my eyes and sigh, because I already know what’s coming. Sure enough, a heavy set of footsteps thud toward us, and a loud crash echoes through the space when Brody rips the door off its hinges and flings it against the wall.

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