Page 72 of Mended Hearts

Listening to Brian recount everything is painful. He goes back to being overseas and piecing together who Dustin was and how it triggered something in him he never knew was there—insecurity. The injury, feeling useless, fear of no longer having his career, fear that I would leave him, coupled with the pain pills that helped drown out the noise turned him into someone he didn’t recognize and couldn’t escape.

“I think a lot of my anger stems from when I lost my dad. I became so enraged with God and how he could let such a man of faith die. He had the power to heal him, and he didn’t. Why?”

“Because it was never about your dad. Your dad’s faith never swayed. But you, you lost your way. And so did I,” I say with tear-filled eyes.

“I think sometimes God tests us to see if we’re going to lean on him through the hard times, or crack under pressure. Ibelieve we all failed the test,” my dad says. “But as long as we’re all still alive and breathing, there’s time to make it right.”

Tears fall down Brian’s face. “I have to make this right.” He sobs. Through my own tears, I watch the boy I’ve loved my whole life break down. Brian begins wiping away at his face, trying to hide the evidence of his sorrow. “I know what I have to do,” he says through shaky breaths.

“I need to go.” I stand abruptly, pushing my chair back as I do. It screeches across the linoleum, causing everyone’s attention to shift my way. I rush to the door, desperate for fresh air. This room is suffocating me.

“Echo,” Brian says, stopping me right as I grab the metal handle. I don’t look back. “I’ll be by for my stuff as soon as I’m released.” He doesn’t say anything else, nor does he need to. He knew we were over once he laid his hands on me.

Chapter Forty-Nine

DUSTIN

Iknew walking out of the hospital and leaving Echo behind was going to be hard, but it was damn near impossible. Thankfully, I had Dax with me.

“Hey, can we make a detour before we head back?” Dax asks.

I don’t know what his detour entails, but I welcome the distraction. I’m about to ask him what wild goose chase he has us going on, but then the water comes into view and a lump fills my throat.

“This is where it happened?” I ask, already knowing the answer. I put my Blazer in park right in front of a bench and sculpture that seems to be a replica of the one Dax presented at the award ceremony. Guilt instantly sweeps over me as I come to the realization that we haven’t had a real conversation about him losing his friend. I’ve been so caught up in my problems that I forgot about him losing someone who was like a brother to him.

Dax gets out and I stay seated, giving him time alone. He walks to the statue and places his hand on it, dropping his head. I imagine him saying a prayer and I close my eyes and do the same. I haven’t said a real prayer since I was eighteen, but right now, prayer feels like the most logical thing to do.

I pray for my brother, who experienced a loss I can’t begin to comprehend.

I pray for Echo and for her to have the strength she needs to face her situation.

I pray for myself, to be able to truly forgive and move on from the past. I pray that I can be whatever Echo needs and a good father to our son.

And I pray for Brian…because I truly want him to get better.

I open my eyes and see Dax at the waterline. He bends over, grabs a rock, and flings his arm from the side of his body, skipping the rock across the top of the water. I hop out and make my way to where he stands and do the same. We silently fling rocks for what feels like an eternity before he begins to speak.

“You know, I loved Lynsie since the day Lincoln introduced me to her,” Dax admits. “I felt like the worst best friend for having those feelings and wanting what was his.” He sits down on the ground, and I join him. “It felt like a curse. I couldn’t control it. I tried. I even debated on getting restationed.” He laughs. “I was actually looking into it right before the accident.” Dax looks over at me and I hold his stare. “It was Lincoln’s last wish for me to watch over Lynsie, but I would’ve done so anyway.”

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.” I place my hand on his shoulder. “I got so wrapped up in my shit that I left you hanging.” I look down and shake my head.

“You’re here for me now. That’s all that matters,” Dax reassures. “I used to think my feelings for her were a curse, but after the accident, I realized they were my purpose.”

His words resonate deep inside me. With everything that’s happened in the past six months, I know the feeling of what seemed to be a curse shaping into a purpose. Echo being pulled from me thirteen years ago, joining the Army, getting injured, the entire situation with Brian—all of it presented itself as acurse. I literally thought I was cursed, but now I’m starting to see the bigger picture. How everything intricately weaves itself back together.

How maybe the universe doesn’t hate me, after all.

“Tell me more about the Broken Wing award you received. I never got the full story behind that.”

Dax laughs and shakes his head. “Two words. Suicide birds.”

Chapter Fifty

ECHO

Absolute dread sets in as I pull into the driveway. It’s not like I expected anything else, but the thickness of it weighs me down and has me second-guessing my decision to come here alone. But I know I need to tackle this on my own. I’ve kept myself together and have stayed strong for the well-being of those around me. But for what? Who’s benefitted from me doing so?

Dylan.

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