Page 21 of Mended Hearts

“It won’t be easy, but it’ll be worth it,” I say as I hold her against me.

“Promise?” she whispers.

“Hell yeah, I promise it’ll be worth it.”

“No, promise you won’t leave me.” Her voice cracks a bit.

“Never. I’m never leaving you,” I vow. The thought of losing her inflicts a palpable pain in my chest. The sensation brings tears to my eyes.

“I believe you.” She breathes against the crook of my neck.

We sit quietly, just taking each other in for what feels like forever. I don’t want to let her go, knowing she’s filled with such grief and doubt. I want to comfort her and erase all those feelings, but I know I can only do so much. She has to trust what I feel and have faith in us. However, I fear with her father hovering over her, those feelings might remain until we graduate.

Just seven more months to go.

“You better go,” Echo says, sitting up quickly. “My dad will be home soon.” She starts having a mini freak-out.

“Hey, hey.” I grab her hand. “You gotta stop. Freaking out won’t help anything. The only thing it’ll do is make you look guilty. Okay?”

She nods, breathing in and out, calming herself down.

“Okay. We got this.”

We stand together and I wrap my arms tightly around her. I want her to feel secure and to know she’s safe with me. She lets out a sigh, and her body relaxes against mine. I love it.

“How are you able to handle this so well? Why haven’t you run in the other direction?” she asks as we both look at each other.

“Because I don’t throw away something that’s valuable. And I see value in you and what we have together.” I give her the short answer. We don’t have enough time on this earth for me to list all the reasons.

She looks at me with such astonishment, like I hung the moon. I will hang the moon for her every night of my life if that’s what she wants.

Chapter Thirteen

ECHO

December 2000

Dustin and I have been keeping our distance from one another in public. I feel as if I’m slowly starting to lose myself to this situation. Maybe that’s what my dad was worried about—that I’d catch a case of puppy love and lose who I was to keep the boy. It’s crazy the opposite is what is causing it. Not being able to freely have the boy and the puppy love wears me down, changing me in ways I never thought possible. I hate it. I want me back.

The realization of it all finally hit me, and determination has since taken over. I’m not going to be ruined by this. I already walk on eggshells with my dad. Why does the rest have to feel like an impossible tight rope to balance as well? I start hanging out at Dave’s on the weekends with the rest of the youth, trying to find a semblance of my old self. But doing it makes me miss Dustin and his presence even more. His humor, the jam sessions they’d have, the play wrestling matches the boys would have…it’s just not the same without him there.

To everyone around us, Dustin and I are single. We made the tough decision to cut the world off from what we have going on. Denying his existence when I see him in the hall is one of the hardest things to do when my entire being feels pulled toward him. But it’s necessary and seems to loosen the vice my dad has on me. All I have to do is make him believe he’s won. Surely, we can keep the charade going long enough.

Tonight, my parents are gone to a Christmas party, and I just can’t pass up the opportunity to see my guy. Sometimes the risk is worth the outcome.

“I got a surprise for you,” Dustin says as he jumps in through my bedroom window.

“A surprise for me?” I ask as I walk up, pulling him in for a hug. “What for?” I hold him tightly, never wanting to let go.

“Do I need a reason?” he breathes against my ear, causing my body to shiver.

He pulls back and hands me a bag. I eagerly pull the handles apart to see what he got me. I giggle as I pull out the package. He found me a glow-in-the-dark Orion’s Belt to place on my ceiling.

“Oh my gosh. I can’t believe you found this. It’s perfect. I love it. I love you,” I say, throwing my arms around his neck.

“I love you, too,” he says against my skin, causing a ripple of goose bumps. He laughs at the effect he has on me as he pulls back. “So”—he glances up at my ceiling—“where ya wanting to put it?”

I climb on my bed, standing up. “Right above me so it’s the last thing I see before I go to sleep and first thing I see when I awake.” I extend my hand for him to join me. We stand on my bed and place the glow-in-the-dark constellation on the ceiling, right above my pillow.

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