Page 132 of The Snowball Effect

“You saidher little sister’s birthday party, and you posted on your social media yesterday about the cake you made for Emma’s sister,” Charlotte pointed out, incredulously.

“Well, I didn’t think you had enough time or care to be creeping on my socials!” Regan shot back, as her cheeks burned.

God damn it! She’d been so good! So careful!

Charlotte closed her eyes, steeping her fingers to her forehead to take a moment to gather herself. “The woman that you realized you were attracted to – the woman you haveapparentlykissed and confessed having feelings for – is Emma? Your roommate? Sutton’s friend? Emma Bordeaux, that Emma?”

“She’s my friend, too,” Regan defended, weakly. “Now.”

Wait – she didn’t have todefendherself!

“I didn’t do anything wrong,” she quickly added, bolstering herself up. “It’s not wrong to like Emma, that way.”

“It’s… not,” Charlotte cautiously agreed, still looking at Regan as if she’d been dropped into an alternate dimension. “I just didn’t anticipate this.”

“Me, neither! We’re in the same boat, there!”

“Well, you’ve had time to process this, and I have not.”

Fair. But, also, “You barely even know Emma!”

“I know enough. I know she and Sutton are close. I know… wait. Isthatwhy you don’t want Sutton to know?” Charlotte pieced together, a dawning gleam in her eyes. “Because as far as I knew, Emma wasn’t queer. Which means, as far asSuttonknows…”

Oh,damn. Regan dropped her whole head into her hands, so, so disappointed with herself. “Yes,” she whispered, dismally. “That’s why I couldn’t talk to Sutton, and that’s why I haven’t been as chatty with her, lately. Because I know that when I talk to Sutton, I’m going to want to tell her all about the way I feel for Emma and how I love the way she smells and the way her lips felt and the night we cuddled and Ican’t, because Emma is so freaking private, that she hasn’t come out to Sutton yet!”

Again, though, it felt so insanely great to be able to say it all aloud! Even if she shouldn’t be.

“The tangled webs we weave,” Charlotte muttered, toying with the bottom of her wine glass with her fingertips, obviously deep in thought.

“I know,” she commiserated. “I’ve really tried to respect Emma in this, and I totally just blew it. I know you don’t want to keep secrets from Sutton, but…”

Regan never tried to complicate things, but complications always seemed to find her.

Minutely shaking her head, Charlotte heaved a long sigh. “No. But, as someone who lived with my sexuality under wraps, I promise that I won’t take it upon myself to discuss Emma’s sexuality, even with Sutton.” She drew in a deep breath, her considering and critical gaze dragging up and down Regan’s face. “To your credit, I never expected that you would have been able to keep such a big secret like this from Sutton in order to preserve Emma’s privacy.”

“I should be offended.” Regan attempted to glare, but it fell apart in seconds. “But I’m surprised even by myself.”

“I think it speaks volumes about how highly you truly regard Emma,” Charlotte surmised, sounding utterly fascinated.

Ridiculously, Regan felt her cheeks heat. “I mean… yeah. I guess that’s true.”

Even though she’d never thought about it like that, Charlotte wasn’t wrong.

“Anyway, enough about that.” She waved her hand, as if waving the conversation away. “What I need to know is – what do I do, now?”

“You’re well aware that I am truly not an expert on relationships,” Charlotte pointed out. “Much as it pains me to admit my own gaps in knowledge.”

“Eh, you have your moments.” After all, it had been Charlotte’s idea to sweep Sutton off of her feet at Oliver’s wedding. “But, yes, I know. Honestly, you’re the best person to talk to right now, because I don’t need relationship advice. I need advice on what to do moving forward. Single, and unexpectedly sapphic.”

“And… you’re positive that Emma doesn’t have any feelings for you, as well?” Charlotte asked.

Regan’s heart skipped at the very thought. Slowly, though, she shook her head, as the reality quickly dampened that hypothetical excitement. “She doesn’t. Shouldn’t come as a surprise.”

She really, really had been trying not to dwell on that. Because if Regan let herself dive too far into the fact that the only person she’d ever felt so much for didn’t feel the same way in return… well, it didn’t feel good, that was for sure.

In fact, it made her stomach cramp, and the backs of her throat feel a little tight.

Instead, she’d been really, really trying to focus on the future, and the actual possibilities it could hold for her.

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