Page 50 of The Snowball Effect

Though, the idea of slipping the note she’d written to accompany this apology under Regan’s door felt more and more appealing as the oncoming embarrassment started to set in with Regan’s footsteps coming closer.

She steeled herself, jumping into action as soon as Regan walked into the living room so that she couldn’t back out.

“I know you don’t want to hear an empty apology, so… I’m not giving you one,” she started. She closed her eyes, gripping with everything she had to her resolve to do what she’d planned on.

She lifted Mr. Cuddles in front of her, clearing her throat as she dipped her voice a few octaves and spoke through him. “Thisis what Mr. Cuddles voice sounds like. And Emma wants you to know that she really is sorry.”

Cheeks burning, she quickly lowered the bear, though still found comfort in stroking her fingers through his fur, as she continued in her normal voice, “I’m sorry not only for what I said the other day but also… because you were right. My issues with you are largely because of my own perception, and I’ve never really given you the benefit of the doubt.”

Swallowing hard, she looked down at her own hands, rubbing her thumb over Mr. Cuddles’ ear. “The truth is that I haven’ttriedwith anyone in a while. I haven’t wanted to.”

This bear that she was clutching was proof of that. How very little had she tried with her own mother?

“Letting people in is really hard for me,” she admitted, her voice falling hoarse. “There have been a lot of times in my life when Idolet someone in and try with them, and it never goes well.”

Kimberly, again, popped into her thoughts. Along with a handful of the kids she’d gone to school with, then Felicity… she shook her head – yeah, she was most definitely not sharing those parts with Regan.

Swallowing thickly, she looked back up, meeting Regan’s wide, surprised stare with her own. “I’ve never had a roommate that wanted to spend time with me the way you do,” Emma admitted softly, her stomach twisting with the truth of the words. “I’ve never really metanyonethat seems to want to get to know me the way you do.”

She’d meant to say that part jokingly, but it came out leaving her feeling unexpectedly vulnerable.

Trying to push through that feeling as quickly as possible, she added, “And I think I’ve dug my heels in even harder with youbecauseI don’t understand why you feel that way, especially when all I’ve done is push you away. So, it makes me feel… uncomfortable. And a little…”

“Prickly,” Regan supplied encouragingly.

Emma narrowed her eyes as she corrected, “Guarded.”

And when Regan brightly grinned, Emma didn’t feel the immediate urge to glare. Which was new.

Maybe this wholefacing the truththing had some merit.

“And, I guess…” She felt she had to admit it because this was the moment of truth. “We kind of are Thom and Geri.”

The grin on Regan’s face grew to a nearly blinding wattage, and Emma didn’t quite understand the relief she felt in seeing it.

“I guess I’ve never known when to quit,” Regan admitted, her voice soft. There was no showing of bravado as her smile dimmed slightly. “I honestly think thatbecauseyou seemed soresistant to me, I put in even more time and energy trying to get you to like me. Which, is crazy.” She breathed out a quiet, self-deprecating laugh. “And I’m sure that roots back into my own… stuff.” She gestured vaguely with her hand before letting it fall to her side.

Emma’s eyebrows lifted in unexpected interest. That felt like a different side of Regan that she’d never seen before.

Feeling bolstered by it, she pushed herself to finish her peace offering. “To show you that I’m making a good faith effort and not just giving you lip service to try to get you to move on from the other day, I’m offering you a full day hang out.”

It did scare her a bit to say those words. Mostly because she still thought Regan was a wild card, and Emma didn’t like unpredictability.

But, she had to admit that seeing the way Regan’s dark eyes widened with surprised delight made her breathe a little easier as she pushed through that feeling.

“Nothing crazy,” she was quick to warn. “I’m not taking a road trip with you. We will not be leaving the city.” She’d heard Sutton’s cautionary tales of Regan getting them lost far too many times. “And I’m not joining any clubs or downloading any apps.”

Again, she’d been in the same social circle as Regan for too long and had heard of far too many stories to be truly comfortable letting Regan run rampant with no parameters for their full-day hang out. She may feel contrite and she wanted to make things right with Regan, but she still had her limits.

“Deal!” Regan pounced on the offer, reaching out her hand.

Emma studied the offered hand skeptically as wariness rose inside of her. “A part of me feels like I’m making a deal with the devil, but…”

She slid her hand into Regan’s, startlingly aware of how soft and comfortably warm Regan’s palm was against her own.

“Please,” Regan scoffed. “You flatter me; I’m merely a humble servant to Lucifer.” She tightened her grip on Emma’s hand, and her strength was surprising. “I have to tell you: I’d already forgiven you after you spoke through Mr. Cuddles. But I appreciate everything else you shared with it.”

Emma groaned loudly, feeling that sense of embarrassment return, which only made Regan laugh. And she’d admit, if only to herself, that she was relieved by the sound.

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