Page 18 of The Snowball Effect

“Um… not yet,” she answered honestly. Because she wasn’t great at lying to her grandmother, and – mostly – because she knew Gram would find out the truth from Kimberly, anyway.

She stared straight ahead down the open, airy hallway as they turned a corner, starting the second half of the loop that would lead back to her grandmother’s room. But she could feel Gram’s eyes on her.

Emma knew how badly her gram wanted that reunion between Emma and her mom. She knew, clear as day, that her grandmother was so desperate for her daughter and granddaughter to forge this unbreakable bond, one that apparently Gram had managed to keep with Kimberly despite all of their issues over the years.

It was something Emma wished so badly to understand. How did her grandmother manage to so easily push through the hurt of Kimberly’s abandonment? Was it different because Kimberly was her daughter, whereas she was Emma’s mother? And, what went even deeper than the hurt – how was it not awkward? How did her grandmother know what to say to Kimberly?

How could she make their relationship seem totally… normal? That was what Emma was most desperate to know.How?

She wished she could ask. She wished that this topic hadn’t become so prevalent in their lives, ever since Kimberly’s grand return a few months ago.

Because Emma’s inability to push through this barrier with her mom seemed to be the biggest disappointment she’d ever caused Gram. And seeing the disappointment on her grandmother’s face when Emma had blurted out how she felt about Kimberly… well, she’d hated it. And she was resolutely not going to repeat it.

“She was here Thursday night, again,” Gram mentioned, a small, hopeful grin playing on her lips. “She brought the girls, and we all went out to dinner. Just to the place down the street, but it really was so lovely. I think, maybe if you spend time with your sistersandyour mom, you might find the girls provide a little conversational relief.”

Even the mention of Emma’s sisters made her stomach tie itself in knots, and she didn’t have the heart to tell her grandmother that she honestly felt the exact opposite. “Uh, maybe.”

Emma could feel her grandmother studying her profile as she quietly said, “You’re always more than welcome to come to Thursday dinners if you want. I think it would begreatto have us all together.”

She could feel her throat tighten at her grandmother’s words, at how hopeful and intent she sounded.

“Yeah, sometime,” she agreed.

And, on some level, she meant it. But that didn’t mean that the idea of making that a reality didn’t make her feel nervous, clammy, and unready.

She heard her phone buzz in her pocket and was relieved for any excuse to check briefly out of this conversation.

Her gram nodded at her. “You should check it. It could be important.”

Regan Freaking Gallagher – 2:31 PM

Hey! Just letting you know that it’s BLAZING hot today – the power went out after you’d left but should be back on soon! Make sure you unplug and re-plug everything in your room!

Maybe she’d spoken too soon about that relief, after all. For a brief moment, she debated not answering before she grumbled to herself and sent off –

Emma Bordeaux – 2:32PM

Thanks for the update/reminder.

“And?” Her grandmother prompted.

Emma felt herself flush as she locked her phone before her grandmother could sneak a peek.

“Uh, it was just Brynn. You know, my coworker. But it’s not urgent.”

It was such a lie, but she didn’t want to disclose the truth.

As far as her grandmother knew, she’d moved in withher friend, Regan– a stretch of the imagination – and that was how she liked to keep it. After her grandmother’s first heart attack, when they’d had to move, Gram had very clearly felt terrible regarding Emma’s living situation. And over time, she’d found that holding onto these little pieces of life and keeping everything – family, relationships, friendships – separate worked very well for her.

Even when she’d told her grandmother about how Regan had put her in the hospital last week, she’d been careful to keep her ire out of her voice.

“Oh, well, give me the work updates!” Gram encouraged excitedly.

That, Emma would happily do.

Emma made it home from Astoria by five, thankful that it seemed the air conditioning in their building had, indeed, kicked back on sometime in the last couple of hours.

She wasdesperatefor this heat wave to come to an end. In the ten-minute walk to her building in the thick, muggy air, she was sweaty, uncomfortable, and wanted nothing more than to strip her sweat-soaked shirt off at the quickest opportunity.

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