Page 126 of The Snowball Effect

Before she could actually ask any of her questions, Regan continued.

“The reality is, Emma, that I like you. In the real girlfriend kind of way. I like you way, way more than just a platonic roommate. That’s why I went out and had drinks with my co-workers on Friday, because I realized I’ve been spending every weekend since you moved in obsessed with spending time with you, in one way or another.”

Emma’s stomach swooped and her knees felt like jelly, as she fell heavily back against the side of the house once more.

“It’s so much more than a simple attraction. I didn’t realize it when I kissed you. I’m new to this!” Regan gestured between the two of them. “And Sutton is my biggest sounding board in life, and I haven’t talked to her about you or us or this–”

Emma hadn’t known she could be evenmorefloored than she already was, but somehow, Regan found a way. “You haven’t talked to Sutton about any of this?!”

Emma hadn’t called Sutton in the past week because she’d been sure that Regan had told Sutton, and she hadn’t felt readyto answer any of the questions she was certain Sutton would have.

“No!” Regan looked at Emma as ifEmmawere the person dropping bombs, here. “Because I know you like privacy, and also because I know there’s nothing to tell her. Notreally. Because I know that nothing is going on between us. I know you were super fucking freaked out when I kissed you, and I promise, Emma, I promise – I’m not trying to do that to you, again.”

“You’re not?” She dimly repeated.

Because Emmawasfreaking out. Her heart was hammering in her chest, and she felt ridiculously – crazily – pleased and flattered and thrilled. And most of all, the alarm sirens were going off deafeningly loud in her head.

“No!” Regan insisted, reaching out to grasp at Emma’s, insistently. Her big, dark eyes were wide and imploring and so deep, Emma swore she could fall into them. “I don’t want to freak you out; I’m not going to go all crazy-stalker or anything because you don’t like me back. It’s fine that you don’t have feelings for me.” She winced. “I mean, it doesn’t make me feelgreat, but it’s okay.”

“Why are you telling me this?” Desperation broke into Emma’s tone, and she found that she couldn’t pull her hand from Regan’s. Instead, she squeezed it. Hard. “Why are you telling me this, at my nine-year-old sister’s birthday party?”

Emma couldn’t freak out here! She couldn’t freak out about the fact that Regan was making the most romantic comments to her thatanyonehad ever made.

“I didn’t mean to! I wasn’t going to tell you at all! I was going to be an adult and just move past these feelings as much as I could, but then Kimberly came over here. And she wanted us to act cute and couple-y and that’s kind of the deal, here, since I’m playing the role of your girlfriend and all.” Regan’s thumbstroked gently over Emma’s knuckles. “I’m absolutely fine, still playing this part. In fact,” a self-deprecating, gorgeous smile flashed over Regan’s face as she stared up at Emma. “I probably like playing the part too much, now. Which, honestly, is why I have to confess the truth to you.”

“Because when I lean into you and kiss your cheek, I get thisrush. And I really, really like it. But it feels wrong, because you don’t know what it’s doing to me. It feels kind of like I’m taking advantage, and that is thelastthing I want to do with you. So, I had to tell you,” Regan finished, eyes searching Emma’s.

She had no idea what Regan was seeing. Emma had very little idea whatshe, herself, was feeling. Bafflingly, she felt like the biggest anchor she had right now was the hold Regan’s hand had on hers.

“Regan?” Kimberly called, before she popped her head around the corner of the house. “I have everything ready for the cake!”

Regan nodded in acknowledgement, keeping her eyes on Emma for several more seconds. “Okay, I’m coming.”

“All righty,” Kimberly ducked away again.

“So… I’m going to go help cut this crazy unicorn cake I’m responsible for. And I’ll let you process. And then we can get back to normal again,” Regan stated, as if she’d resolved every problem. As if she hadn’t just thrown a major bomb at Emma, and caused a much bigger ripple effect.

She stroked her thumb softly over the back of Emma’s hand once more, and they both looked down at the way their fingers were linked.

Somehow, theyreallydid fit together so well.

“See, this is what I’m talking about,” Regan said, her voice so soft and so… reverent. It was the only word Emma could think of that made sense.

And it made everything inside of Emma that was going haywire at Regan’s confession melt to a fucking puddle.

“When I run my thumb over your knuckles and feel your skin under mine, it makes me feel so electric. Like I’ve never been more alive, and all we’re doing is holding hands,” she whispered, still staring down at them. “I’ve never had that feeling, before.”

Emma’s heart was in her throat at the gentle confession, something big and soft and overwhelming threatening to break free.

Blessedly – or not? – Regan sighed, and slid her hand out of Emma’s, shaking her hair back and smiling up at Emma once more. “Anyway. I think it’s good that you know, now. God knows I wasn’t going to be able to keep this in, and at least this time I was able to tell you with words and not a kiss.”

With that, Regan sent her another look, before turning and walking away.

nineteen

“Regan,this is the best fucking cookie I’ve ever had in mylife! I’m going to enter this recipe in the Primrose Grove baking contest,” Phoebe announced. “Let’s see if Marcia Weatherby and her little chocolate chunks can beatthese,” she huffed.

Bea knocked her shoulder against Phoebe’s, rolling her eyes up at Regan from across the counter. “This recipe belongs to Regan; if anyone is going to enter it in the contest, it should be Sherry. Regan’s datinghergranddaughter.”

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