Page 29 of Mud

I went for a smile, this time deliberately. “Thanks for… the tips.” Stepping back, I held onto the tray tightly. What the hell else was I supposed to say?

Bye? See you around? Catch you later?

It occurred to me that I had no idea how to speak to people who didn’t know who I was, who didn’t try to kiss my ass in hopes to gain something out of a friendship with me. It occurred to me that I was completely, utterlycluelessin the how-to-make-friends department.

Fuck, life with Madeline Rogan had screwed me over worse than I’d even realized. Poppy would have nailed this had she been here instead of me. She had no trouble talking to strangers. She’d probably have this guy’s number by the minute’s end—which gave me a strange sense of jealousy.

And before I made an ass of myself by standing there a second longer, I just turned around and walked away without a word, hoping my cheeks didn’t melt off my face.

Stupid, silly Rora,I chided myself in my head. A hot guy smiles at me and I lose all sense and forget how to even talk properly?Get a grip!

Except…

“So, who is he?”

I stopped.

I turned.

The boy had taken a few steps in my direction, one hand in the pocket of his pants, the other playing with what looked like a penny between his fingers. The sun did fall on his head now, and his hair was a deep, rich ashy brown. I wondered if it would feel as silky smooth as it looked if I dared to reach out and touch it.

I wondered what it would be like to touch those dimples, to trace the perfect curves of his lips.

“Who’s who?” I thought to ask because I had no clue what he was talking about.

He grinned like that again, like he knew all the dirty secrets of the world, and it suited him so perfectly.

Then he took two more steps closer to me. “The guy I have to break you up with.”

Yes, my cheeks were most definitely going to melt off my face now.

Do something!I shouted at myself in my head, and holding onto the tray until my fingers turned numb, I pretended I was a book character and said, “Why? Are you planning to ask me out?”

That sounded like something someone cool would say—at least in my head.

Another two steps, and the boy was in front of me again. We were in the middle of the busy cafeteria, people coming and going in all directions, yet to me we could have been the only people there.

“Why? Are you planning to say yes?” he said, and not just my cheeks, but my whole chest melted.

I swallowed hard, loving and hating his undivided attention, both because I wanted it to last forever, and because I needed a break from it so I could think of a reply.

Then I said, “Are you the type of guy who needs to bereassured of an outcome before you take action? Or are you more ballsy than that?”

There I went and blew it up again—ugh.But he was looking at me like that and I was standing on needles, and…it didn’t matter.

I’ll be damned, but it didn’t even matter. He didn’t turn away—he was smiling still. I was smiling, too. And I was willing to bet my right hand that my eyes were sparkling just as much as his.

“I usually just go with my gut feeling,” was what he said.

My voice came out a bit breathless when I said, “Thought so.”

Another half a step toward me, and now I could count each individual lash on his lids if given the chance.

“Go out with me.”

Yes, yes—YES!

I composed myself, however. I was playing a book character here, wasn’t I?

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