Page 70 of Mistle-Ho

I let out a sigh that turns into a groan. “If you have any ideas on how to accomplish that without causing him a full menty B, let me know.”

Maddie’s expression falls immediately, sadness taking over her pretty features. “It’s my fault.” She says it quietly. “I feel like all my shit has turned him into a different person, and he doesn’t deserve that.” She gives me a sad smile. “He’s amazing and should be with someone whose life is uncomplicated.”

I don’t like what I think she’s getting at here, and I sure as hell don’t want her feeling guilty. “We might have to agree to disagree on this, because Leo was an asshole to me plenty of times growing up, so I think he has some shit coming to him.”

Maddie’s smile lifts a tiny bit more, but she still looks despondent. “If it was just normal shit, I might be fine with it. But what I’m dealing with is so much more than that.” She sucks in a breath, eyes lifting to the ceiling. “He’s afraid to even leave me alone for the weekend because of my ex.” Her eyes come to mine. “How is he going to focus on actual games when he can barely make it through a charity game without texting to make sure I’m okay?”

I lift one finger, hating that I have to correct her, but I don’t want Maddie to make the same mistake I have. “They are actually called matches.”

Maddie’s smile turns a little more genuine. “See? I don’t even know the proper terminology for his career.” She deflates, blowing out a loud sigh. “He does so much for me, and I’m just a mess. It all feels so one-sided and unfair.”

I feel a little of that myself. “It is kind of weird when you’re used to men who do the bare minimum and then end up with a guy who just wants to take care of you, isn’t it?”

Maddie’s dark brows lift as she gives me a sly look. “It sounds like you’re familiar with that problem.”

I scrunch my face up. “Is it really a problem?” It’s something I’ve been working through the past few days, and I’ve come to a realization or two. “Yes, Gavin cooks our dinners and brushes my hair and rubs my feet and would pretty much jump through any hoop I came up with, but I bring a lot to the table too.” I stand taller, trying to let a little of my confidence rub off on my new friend. “I’m a great conversationalist, I babysit his pets, and I have amazing tits.”

Maddie’s eyes drop to her significantly flatter chest. “I’m probably screwed then, because my brain won’t shut up long enough for me to be a great conversationalist, your brother doesn’t have any pets, and I don’t have much more than nipples on skin.”

I can’t do anything to help her with the conversation thing. She’s going through a lot, so her poor little brain doesn’t need to be any more overwhelmed. I can do something about the other parts though. “Listen.” I lean in, lowering my voice conspiratorially even though we’re the only two here. “Boobs are all fucking amazing. And we could totally find Leo a pet for you to take care of when he’s out of town.”

Maddie twists her lips to one side, pursing them tight before saying, “Leo probably could use a pet.”

I grin. “That’s the spirit.” I turn toward the hall. “So let’s take care ofmyboyfriend’s weird pets, and then we can go findyourboyfriend a weird pet.” Gavin told me where he adopted Cilantro, and I’m sure that place has a whole variety of crazy kitties to choose from.

Maddie follows behind me as I stride into the bedroom Cilantro and Terry share. She eyes the iguana’s cage warily, lingering in the doorway as I move to refill the lizard’s food and water. “Just so we’re clear, I’m not getting Leo a lizard.”

“Probably a good choice, because these things are high maintenance.” I shoot her a grin. “They’re even worse than I am.”

I turn back to Scary Terry’s enclosure and look him over, tipping my head at the odd color of his skin. I lean closer and it almost seems like he’s breathing faster than normal. “Are you okay, buddy?” I reach in to give him a little pet, but he doesn’t lean into my touch like normal. “Ohno.” I shake my head and raise my voice. “You are not going to get sick and die on my watch.”

“Ishe sick?” Maddie’s voice is right beside me, and I turn to find her peering in at Terry. “He doesn’t look very good, does he?”

“Not at all.” I inspect the food and water and it doesn’t look like he’s eaten anything since I was here last night. “Shit.” I fish my cell phone from my pocket and dial the number of the only person who can possibly help me in this situation.

My boss picks up after a few rings. “Alexis? Is everything okay?” He’s been a little jumpy since I had to call and tell him his newest employee assaulted me in the office.

“I’m taking care of Gavin’s lizard while he’s gone, and it doesn’t look very good.”

“Okay.” He drags the word out. “How does it look?”

I tip my head, trying to come up with a word to describe what I’m seeing. “Peaked?” I check the food dish again, confirming it’s as full as I remembered. “And I don’t think he’s eating. Is there like, a vet or something I can take him to? I don’t want this thing to die while Gavin’s out of town playing in a charity match.”

“Understandable. Let me get you the number of the vet I use for Amidala.” He goes quiet for a minute and then my phone buzzes in my hand, alerting me to the shared contact. “Try them. I’m pretty sure they take emergencies since they’re the only exotic vet around.”

“Awesome. Thank you so much.” I offer a goodbye then dial the number he sent, filling the woman who answers in on the situation with Terry.

“I think you should bring him in. We can give him a look and make sure it’s nothing serious.” Unfortunately, the only opening she offers is in thirty minutes which will be cutting it close. I take the appointment and immediately go to work trying to maneuver the iguana out of its enclosure.

Maddie watches me closely but doesn’t offer to help. “You are way braver than I am.”

“I bet you would do this for Leo.” I finally free Terry and adjust my grip so I’m sure I won’t drop him.

Maddie gets an odd look on her face. “You’re right.” She looks at where I hold the iguana. “I would do anything for him.”

“See?” I walk past her into the hall. “Come on. You have to drive because this thing is as big as I am.”

“ARE YOU SURE you can’t tell?” I adjust the blanket wrapped around my shoulders, tucking it tighter against my neck. “If the property manager sees this thing she’ll probably evict me on the spot.”

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