Page 33 of Tormented Dreams

He and Grace didn't have that…yet. But he thought it was possible they could. And he wasn't opposed to finding out whether there was a chance for them to get there.

He missed her so much. It felt as if an essential part of him had been taken away. He had feelings for her he'd never developed for any other woman. He wasn't yet sure if it was love, but the sentiment was strong enough he felt confident to at least try a more conventional relationship with her, and that was a pretty big thing for him.

The emotions felt like they were all but bursting out of him. He wanted to tell her that and explore it with her.

If he ever managed to see her.

In truth, he had never been opposed to discussing alternative relationship options with Grace. She had simply never given him the chance. She'd gotten defensive and made assumptions, none of which were accurate. But Xavier was convinced those were just sensitivities born of anger and frustration and declared when tiredness, antagonism and resentment had reduced both of them to hurling retaliatory hurts which they didn't necessarily mean.

The first time he’d come here looking for her, the day after their argument, she had refused to see him.

The wounds had been too fresh, he surmised, so Xavier had chosen to give her some space, a little time to calm down and be ready to listen, so they could talk like the rational adults they were.

But of course, none of that was ever going to happen if he couldn't find her.

His shoulders slumped and he sighed, turning away.

Taking a few steps, he looked back over his shoulder, his gaze inexplicably drawn to a window near the door.

That was when he felt it.

Like someone had just punched him in the gut, causing enough pain to double him over.

She was there, had been there all the time. She obviously just didn't want to see him.

Their eyes met and clung for several long seconds until Xavier wrenched his gaze away and forced himself to turn around and carry on walking as if his heart hadn't been wrenched out of his chest and hurled onto the ground then trampled into the dust along with that small kernel of hope.

She may not have said the actual words, but Grace had spoken to him loud and clear with her actions.

There was nothing left for him here, after all.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

Grace's eyes widened as she saw Xavier looking straight at her. For a moment, she was tempted to run after him, but sheer obstinacy made her hold her ground. It was up to the man to do the running as far as she was concerned. And Xavier needed to do just that if he wanted to convince her that she should bother speaking to him again, regardless of how much she missed him.

Except, as their eyes clung, she was shocked by the brief flash of hurt she saw in his.

She sucked in a sharp breath, ready to tell her admin to let Xavier back in when he turned around and came back for her, but suddenly, whatever it was she thought she'd seen in his eyes was quickly replaced, his eyes going hard and his mouth firming into a hard line, and Grace couldn't help feeling like she'd lost something precious.

She broke his gaze and headed for the door. What the hell was wrong with her? All she’d wanted was some kind of sign that she meant something to him. Something that proved he was willingto fight for their relationship as much as she was, now that she'd had the chance to calm down and think through her actions.

But she'd fucked up all over again, because he had come, just like she'd wanted him to. And instead of greeting him with open arms, instead of even talking things over like the mature woman she prided herself on being, she'd had him sent away.

She wrenched open the main entrance door and raced down the steps, almost stumbling in her high-heeled shoes in her haste.

But it was too late. All she could see of Xavier was the pungent, grey plume of exhaust fumes his car left as he gunned the engine and raced away from her.

Oh, God! What had she done?

As a feeling of desolation and loss swept over her, Grace was left with the certain knowledge that pride was an exceptionally cold bedmate.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

Xavier sat, subdued, in his practice's office and studied the letter that had come across his desk that morning for what must be the tenth time.

It wasn't like him to be so distracted on a workday, but today wasn't any normal workday… Well, not any more anyway.

Looking over the correspondence one more time, he realised the words had simply started to blur together into a black and white filament of nothingness. But it didn't matter. He could probably recite the entire page word for word without having to look at it.

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