Page 71 of Barbed Wire Hearts

ChapterForty-Four

WILEY

Her words echo in my mind as she drifts off to sleep. Exhaustion was dragging at her body long before we ever set up camp, her body demanding rest after fighting mother nature for nearly an hour. I don’t think she even realizes just how long she was in that river before Levi even got to her. When I’d seen her fall from her horse and go under, I’d nearly lost my mind. Levi had taken off immediately in the side-by-side, dropping everything and taking off, and it was a good thing. The side-by-side could go down the river bank faster than our horses. It’s no wonder he was the first one there. I’d seen Dakota’s indecision when she’d gone under. He had to take up the rear, and if we all moved, the cows would backtrack. For a second, I thought he was going to stay behind while Levi and I went after her. Instead, he’d shouted for the others to take over and we’d raced after Levi.

Good thing, too. I might have whooped his ass had he stayed.

Kate deserves better than that, and it hadn’t been her fault she’d fallen off. We hadn’t seen the log. It’d been beneath the waves and by the time it surfaced, there hadn’t been much time to react at all. The cows had panicked and surged toward Kate. In turn, her horse had panicked and reared up. Water and a panicked horse don’t mix, and she’d gone in before we could do a damned thing to help.

Part of me blames Dakota for forcing Kate to go in at the point after I’d warned him. She’s too green, and while she’s been a great learner, only experience can tell you what to do in moments like that. She shouldn’t have been alone.

The funny thing is I think Dakota blames himself, too.

He’s been silent since we pulled them out of the river. We’d been dangerously close to losing both of them. Had Kate left Levi when he told her to, we’d have lost him alone. There’d only been one way they were coming out of that river and it was together. I’m grateful Kate refused to leave him. I’ve lost people before, and I don’t have any desire to lose anyone else, especially the man I consider a brother and the woman I’m damn sure I’m in love with.

Today made me realize that. It also reminds me I haven’t told her that. I haven’t even told her my past.

Guilt starts to eat at me. Until now, I’ve deferred to Dakota on when is a good time to tell her our pasts. While I agree some of it isn’t mine to tell, I can at least explain exactly who and what I am. Small pieces at a time will be fine. I don’t think she’s running anywhere.

She hadn’t run from Levi when he needed her most.

The asshole starts to snore over there, and I shake my head. He’s gonna hurt like a bitch tomorrow and he won’t admit it. I’d seen that hit, right in the surgery scar in his spine. We should probably get him checked out, but he likely won’t agree to any sort of checkup. We’ll have to surprise him. Until then, I’ll make sure he keeps popping those pills. They’re the only thing that’s gonna get him through.

I turn toward Dakota to see him still awake, his eyes on the stars. “You call Wayne down at the hospital?” I whisper softly so I don’t wake Kate and Levi. They’ve earned their rest.

Dakota nods. “They’ll be here before we head out in the mornin’,” he murmurs back, his voice emotionless.

“Stop doin’ that,” I chastise.

“What?”

“Withdrawing,” I grunt. “You always do it after some big emotion. You were scared earlier. Embrace it. I’m sure Kate would like to know you care.”

He meets my eyes. “I’m not so great at that.”

“None of us are,” I grunt. “That’s what makes us those rattlesnakes you warned her about.” His face twists but I shake my head. “I don’t blame you, but I think it’s time we start telling her. Don’t you?”

He studies me, taking in my expression. “You love her, don’t you?”

“You don’t?” I shoot back instead of answering. When he doesn’t reply, I scowl. “I’m the only damn one willin’ to admit it around here it seems.”

“Not all of us can be so carefree, Wiley,” he deadpans.

“Fuck you,” I growl. Kate stirs and cuddles closer to Levi so I lower my voice so I don’t wake her. “Fuck you,” I repeat softer. “Quit lyin’ to yourself and you’d have a better go of it.”

“I shouldn’t have even put my hat in the ring,” he murmurs.

“Well, ya did, and it’s done,” I say, shaking my head. “You break her heart, the both of us are gonna kick your ass, Dakota.”

He falls silent, his emotions hanging in the air between us despite them not showing in his eyes. “I’m a selfish man. You know that.”

Which is code for Dakota saying he won’t be giving her up, no matter what he thinks is a good idea.

“Yeah, well, you better start showin’ her you care, or it won’t matter if you’re selfish or not,” I grumble. “Get some sleep. We’re gonna have to start the morning with an argument when Wayne gets here.”

We fall into silence for a few minutes, but as I look up at the stars, I make my decision.

“I’m tellin’ her. Tomorrow,” I whisper.

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