Page 12 of That One Heartbreak

“I meant you’re not in your usual running gear,” she added, trying to make it better.

A smile pulled at the corner of his lips.

“I’m not running tonight,” he told her. “I just finished band practice.”

She’d forgotten he drummed in a local band. Did the man have any spare time? Well, quite clearly he did – enough to check up on her every evening.

But he was early tonight.

“If you’re worried about the snakes, I checked the outside of the house,” she told him. “No entry points. And no more snake sightings.”

“I wasn’t worried about the snakes,” he murmured, but there was still a hint of relief in his voice. “Can I come in?” he asked. “There’s something I want to run past you.”

“What is it?” she asked, looking up at his face. She felt hyper aware of this man. Of his height, his strength.

Having him so close made her feel dizzy.

“I just wanted to talk to you about James,” he said. “Give me five minutes, and I’ll be gone. Promise.”

Curious, she stepped aside and let him in. If she’d thought he was overwhelming before, now it felt like all of her senses werebeing overloaded. The hallway was small and he felt too big for it.

She couldn’t remember the last time a grown man had been in the house, other than her stepfather. Maybe last fall when they had the furnace serviced? Either way, it made her feel off kilter. A little tingly.

“Come on into the living room,” she suggested, mostly because that was the only room that didn’t look like a hurricane had rushed through it.

The room felt cold when they walked inside. She pointed at a chair and he sat down and leant forward, his elbows resting on his long legs. She followed suit, sitting opposite him.

“Is James in trouble?” she asked, because she couldn’t work out why he was here.

“No. But he came to see me at work today.”

She blinked. “James did?” Why would he do that? She felt dizzy, like she was losing control. She didn’t like it.

“He wanted to talk to me about the junior firefighters.”

Of course he did.

“He shouldn’t have interrupted you at work,” she told him. “I’m sorry. I’ll speak to him about it.”

“He really wants to join, Kate. And we really want him there.” Marley ran the pad of his thumb across his chin, capturing her face with his eyes. “And I hate to say it, but I think it’s what Paul would have wanted, too.”

“Paul wanted James to go to college,” she said, trying to keep her voice even. “It was his dream.”

“He can still go to college and be a firefighter,” Marley said softly. “I volunteered all through my four years.”

Suddenly, her heart felt tender. Like somebody had taken it out and pulverized the muscle. The thought of James in a uniform made her want to be sick. “I already told him no,” she said. “And I meant it. He needs to concentrate on hisschoolwork. His grades haven’t been great since…” She let out a low sigh.

Marley’s gaze didn’t waver from hers. She felt exposed in a way she didn’t like at all.

“Why not just try it?” he asked her gently. “See if he can combine it with his studies? If it doesn’t work, no harm no foul.”

Every word he said made sense. And yet she couldn’t agree to this. She wouldn’t be able to cope if James got hurt. And yes, she knew they were careful with the junior firefighters. But she also knew that as soon as he turned sixteen he could join the official volunteer team. He would go on call outs, do almost everything a firefighter could do.

A ragged breath escaped her lips. “I’m sorry, I can’t.”

Marley’s face was full of compassion and she hated that. She’d have preferred he fought her, made her angry. Because she was so full of damn emotions she wasn’t sure she could keep them all in.

And then the screaming started from upstairs. Not the scary kind. The sort that told her that Addy and Ethan had both gotten out of bed and in the middle of an angry spat that only six- and eight-year-olds could have. She squeezed her eyes shut. “I need to go.”