Page 111 of Burn With Me

“Why the sudden rush? This is the third business you’ve pulled out of this week, Scott. Something I need to know?” Mick asks, revealing information that’s news to me.

What other businesses did he pull out of? Andwhyis he doing this so suddenly?

An uneasy feeling starts to pool in my stomach, like butterflies with razor-sharp wings barely grazing the lining, testing my resolve. “What’s going on, Scott?”

His eyes find mine at my use of his name. Rarely do I ever use it without the title Uncle in front of it, even at the office. “I’ve got cancer.”

Carmela sucks in a sharp breath while Mick lets out his in a long exhale. Meanwhile, I feel like I’ve forgotten how to breathe.

The room is dead silent while we process what he’s just told us. And the entire time, he just stands there like he’s only told us he’s about to retire early—a slight smile on his face while he waits for us to speak.

Finally, it’s Mick who breaks the silence.

“What type?” he asks.

“Colon. Stage four.”

“Fuck, Scott. When did you find out?” Carmela’s voice is softer than I’ve ever heard, heavy with empathy.

I’m still sitting on the couch, shell-shocked at the news. I can’t think properly, breaths coming in shallow waves as the conversation continues without me.

“I’ve known for a while. By the time they found it, it had already spread. It’s in my lungs now, and they just found a spot in my brain.”

“Okay, so what’s the plan? What’s the treatment? Who do we need to call? What strings need to be pulled? Clinical trials?” Mick sounds like any other rich man when faced with a problem.

Throw money at it, and it will go away.

“There is no plan. Even if I’d started treatment when I found out, it wouldn’t have mattered. The best they could have done is give me more time, but that isn’t how I want to live the rest of my life.”

“Scott–” Carmela starts, but I cut her off this time as my voice finally returns to me.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

From my peripheral, I can see both Mick and Carmela startle and look my direction as if my speaking reminded them that I’m still here—hisfamily.

“I didn’t want to burden you, Jackson. It’s why I’ve been pushing so hard for you to take over for me.” His eyes are heavy with remorse, and suddenly, there’s a fire in me that’s raging.

“I don’t give a shit about taking over for you! I give a shit about you staying alive! We could have been finding the best doctors with the best treatments for you. What have you been doing to treat it this whole time?” I stand from the couch because I can’t sit anymore.

Mick walks over to Carmela, placing his hand on her back as he nods to the door. “We should give them a moment.”

I begin to pace as they make their way to the exit, my uncle watching them go as if he’s a kid about to be scolded by a parent, and he wants the other around to play the good guy.

When the door shuts behind them, he takes the lead, answering my earlier question. “Jackson, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. But I didn’t say anything to you for the same reason I didn’t tell your aunt. You both would have wanted me to do everything to beat it, but there is no beating it. By the time I knew, it was already too late. I’ve got a few years left in me. Idon’t want to spend them sick, chained to a hospice bed. That isn’t how I want to go out.”

My sinuses burn, and I breathe through my mouth harshly, bending over to put my hands on my knees as I hang my head. Tailor men don’t cry, but tears are threatening to form, and my lunch wants to make a reappearance.

“How long have you known?”

“Jackson–”

“HOW LONG?”

Now he’s looking at me with pity, and my hands ball into fists as I look around the office for something—anything—to take my rage out on.

“About a year and a half.” He pushes off the minibar and walks closer to me, setting his drink down on Carmela’s desk as he passes it. “This was exactly why I didn’t want to tell you. I understand you’re upset, but this isn’t your decision.”

“Oh, fuck you! It’s nevermydecision, is it? You decide everything for me! Were you just never going to tell me? Never going to eventryto fight it?” I throw my hand in the air and turn away from him, walking to stare out the window as I attempt to get my anger under control.

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