Page 1 of Pretty Heartache

ONE

Eleven Years Old

Summer is my favorite time of year. The two and a half months between the last day of school and the first of the next grade are pure bliss. Ice-cold lemonade, lounging by the pool, sunburnt skin, and the way my chest bubbles in anticipation. The anticipation I get every time I seehim.

I used to dread summer. The few short months only gave my father more opportunities to criticize me. To remind me of all the ways I’m a disappointment and how he wished I were never born—a fact he’s never shied away from making public knowledge. But for the past two years, I’ve waited impatiently for summer.

I no longer have to hide in the spaces I know my father will have a harder time finding me. I no longer have to lurk around the house in a constant state of nervousness, waiting for the moment my father walks in the door, blaming me for existing in his world and stealing his oxygen.

School always provided an eight-hour window away from the tension at home, but during the two and a half months it was stripped away, I was left to my own devices, fighting for my own survival.

Until a few summers ago.

I haven’t been completely free from my father’s wrath, but trips to the pool and the way he makes my heart race at the sight of him are the perfect distractions.

“Do you think I can get a tan this time without burning first?” Ember, my tan-obsessed best friend asks me. She sprays her arms, dousing them in the brown liquid coming from the bottle gripped between her hot pink-painted fingernails.

There are only three weeks left of summer vacation before we start the seventh grade, and Ember has made it her number one goal to get the deepest tan she can manage before we return to middle school.

“Doesn’t that stuffattractthe sun?” I sniff, the scent of my sunblock flooding my nostrils. My mother always insists on me wearing it, reminding me of the dangers of developing skin cancer at a young age. Ember doesn’t seem concerned. The risk of cancer is worth it if she looks like she’s been baking in the sun all summer long.

“Yes, Adeline,” she retorts with a grin. She smooths her hand over her left arm, rubbing it in. “That’s the point.”

“Well.” I sigh, squinting up at the sun through my sunglasses. “I guess it’s a race to see who wins. The tan or the burn.”

Ember laughs and playfully slaps me on the arm before sitting back in her chair. We both sit in silence and people watch. It’s our favorite thing to do when we come to the Cambridge Country Club pool every day.

“You should get used to tanning if you want to become a model,” Ember says, breaking our silence.

“Models don’t need to be tan.” I think back to all the ones I admire. Even my mother when she used to model. I want to be just like her when I’m old enough. My mother became a model when she was only fourteen. I’ve begged her for years to let mestart at the same age she did, but she won’t let me. Not until I’m eighteen.

Only seven more years.

“You’re going to be a beautiful model, Adeline.” Ember smiles. “You’re already beautiful, but you get what I mean.” She tilts her head and studies me. “It’s those cheekbones. You’ve got good cheekbones.”

I smile inwardly and allow us to sit in silence once more. But our relaxation is temporary.

Ember squirms beside me, buzzing with excitement at the prospect of seeing the boy she’s had a crush on all summer long. Teddy Long is sixteen years old and the hottest lifeguard at the club. According to Ember, that is.

I giggle as she adjusts the straps of the bikini—the one her mother allowed her to wear—the moment Teddy emerges from the locker room before climbing the small ladder and taking his seat.

She blows out a nervous breath between her glossed lips. “I’m going to talk to him today.” Her eyes are trained on Teddy, but mine are on someone else.

The one person I’ve been anxious to see all summer walks out from the club bar wearing a suit, as always. The white shirt under his dark blue blazer is unbuttoned halfway. Typical for him. Unusual for the country club poolside bar, because while everyone else is in their swimsuits, Micah looks like he’s just walked out of an important business meeting.

He’s tall, dark-haired, and has these blue-gray eyes that shoot straight for my heart every single time they swing in my direction. It’s a bolt of lightning I chase every year.

Micah Lucas Harding. I feel his name on my lips as I mouth them to myself.

“Micah and Archer are here?” Ember asks, turning her head in their direction. I must have said his name out loud without realizing it.

My cheeks heat. “They are?” I play off her question as if I didn’t just say Micah’s name out loud. I lower my sunglasses and shimmy my shoulders against the back of my pool chair, but Ember isn’t in the dark about my feelings for my older brother’s best friend.

“You just said his name out loud, Addy.” She giggles.

“No, I didn’t.” I inhale a deep breath, thankful my eyes are shielded by my sunglasses and Ember can’t call me out on my obvious lie.

“Whatever.” She sighs. “You don’t have to pretend for my sake. I know you look forward to seeing him every summer. You’ve known him practically your whole life, but now that he comes to the pool every year during the summer, you can’t stop talking about him. I just think it’s silly you have a crush on someone over ten years older than you.”

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