Page 78 of Warrior's Walk

I nod, swallowing hard past the constriction in my throat.

“He’s badass! Reminds me of my drill sergeant in basic,” Villaro cracks.

I roll my eyes, snorting at his assessment of Riggs. He’s not far off. Warren and Ormen are grinning, like they’re impressed I kept a secret this long. “Are we good?”

Ormen clasps my hand. “Of course we’re good. We’re brothers.”

Warren straight up cackles. “You dirty dog. He’s gonna put a hurting on you, boy. You’re gonna need more physical therapy after he’s done with you.”

All my fears pop like a balloon and I dissolve into laughter with them as they make joke after joke about my sex life. I wish Brian were here, that he could have found the courage to do what I did and come out the other side better for it.

We shoot the shit for another hour, and another round of beer. “Hey, I’m gonna take off. I’ve got a long drive home.”

“Do you want to crash with us? I bet we could sneak you into the barracks.”

“No,” I laugh. “I got someone waitin’ for me at home. I’d rather share a bed with him than you.”

As I head out to my car, I feel relieved that it went so well. It feels like shedding a fifty-pound rucksack from my shoulders after carrying it for a fifteen-mile run. If that fifteen-mile run lasted the last four years. I guess they truly are my brothers because they were definitely tested tonight.

The drive flies by quickly as I sing along to the radio.Peter Cetera’s‘In Your Eyes’comes on—a classic—and I turn the volume up. The words remind me of Riggs. The light… the heat… I am complete. God, I can’t wait to see him. I bet he’s in the hot tub, buck-ass naked and waiting for me. The roads are empty at this time of night, and I step on the pedal a little harder, trying to shorten my ETA. At about the halfway mark, I pick up the phone and dial my mama. It’s late, but I’m dying to tell her about my day, but the phone just rings and rings before it goes to voicemail.

“Mama, it’s me. You won’t believe the incredible day I had. I can’t wait to tell you about it. Call me tomorrow mornin’ first thing. No, never mind. I’ll come by and have breakfast with you. Night Mama, love you.”

It’s almost midnight when I finally make it home. Riggs isn’t in the hot tub. He’s sitting at the dining table in the dark, his silhouette backlit by moonlight shining through the sliding glass doors.

“You’re still up.”

“You’d know that if you’d have called.” His tone sounds ominous, and I immediately go on the defensive.

I set my keys down on the counter, cautiously moving closer, and gauging his mood. “You’re pissed.”

“No, Rhett. I’m not pissed.”

He says it too calmly, and I can only guess the words on the tip of his tongue that he hasn’t spilled. “I guess I got wrapped up in my head and lost track of time when I was drivin’ and then, before I knew it, I was here.”

Riggs comes to his feet, sliding his hands in his pockets. He just stands there, feet braced wide, waiting for me to spill it.

“I had the most amazin’ day. Rand took me up in the air in one of his planes. Riggs, you wouldn’t believe how good it felt. I was flyin’! At the mercy of the crosswinds. It rattled the planeevery which way but loose, and the vibration of the engine, and the roar, it was deafening. He gave me these headphones to wear, and it muffles it some, but not completely, just enough to make it bearable. But you’re still in the moment, you know? Still feelin’ and hearin’, and experiencing everything, and the thrill of it, fuck, I can’t even describe the thrill of it.”

I feel myself getting all worked up again just talking about it, yet Riggs is as calm and collected as I’ve ever seen him. “And then what?” he asks.

“And then… I called up the guys ’cause I had to tell them. Couldn’t wait to share it with them. I mean, if anyone knows what I’m missin’, and how bad it hurts not to jump anymore, it’s them, you know? They were worried about me after they visited and I just wanted to tell them I think it’ll be okay. If I can’t jump, maybe I can fly. I’ve never felt so alive, not since…”

My words die off with my next breath. We both know how long it’s been since I’ve felt alive. I don’t have to remind either of us.

I wish I could get a read on him. I’m starting to feel like I stepped in deep shit. He moves closer, but even when there’s less than three inches separating us, it feels like the widest canyon.

“I’m not pissed at you. I’m just angry with myself for believing this could work. I knew better, but I wanted this so badly, and I convinced myself that we could make this work.”

I slide my hands in the pockets of my jeans ’cause I’m so fucking nervous I don’t know where else to put them. “We can! Of course we can. I just…” My fingers brush against a slip of paper, and I pull it out of my pocket to see what it is.

Riggs frowns and grabs it from me. “What’s this?” I can’t see ’cause there’s no fucking lights on! “Really, Rhett? Tell me again how you were just out drinking with the guys.”

“I don’t even know what that is! I’ve never seen it before.” He flicks on the dining room light and holds up the slip of paper so I can see. A phone number written in pink ink.

Fuck. Fucking fuck. Triple fuck.

“The waitress must’ve slipped it in with the change she handed me. She was makin’ eyes at me all night.”

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