Page 26 of Just A Kiss

“I am, but it doesn’t mean I can’t sit back and laugh at your expense when you're getting your ass handed to you by my woman,” he states, sitting on a stool next to me. Lindsay sets down a second plate, filled just as full as mine, with all the same delicious-looking food.

She holds up a coffee pot and an empty cup, offering it to me. “Want a cup?”

“Yes, please.” She sets it down in front of me, filling it up to the very brim. I sip down a little bit of the hot liquid, feeling the caffeine hit my bloodstream almost instantly. I might have drunk an unknown amount of whiskey last night and woken up hungover as fuck, but I’m doing pretty good right about now.

* * *

“Okay, give it to me,”I instruct Lindsay once we’ve all finished our breakfast and the kitchen has been cleaned up, the dishes loaded into the dishwasher. I’m kicked back in Tucker’s recliner while the two of them are curled up together on the couch. I swear he has to be touching her at all times when they’re in the same room.

“I’ll keep this as short and sweet as I can and get it all out. Then I won’t rehash things with you unless you specifically ask me to,” she says, pausing to take a deep breath. “I understand you’re an adult and can make your own decisions, but I think you royally fucked up yesterday. Allison is one of the best people that you will ever meet, as you well know. She’s kind and loyal to a fault. I know it's your ‘thing’.” she says, using air quotes as she says that last word, “being a lifelong bachelor, but do you really think that will keep you happy for the rest of your life? Think of how much your parents enjoy having you and your siblings over for family events, and how excited your mom was when your sister got engaged, and now to have grandkids on the way. Thinking you can’t do all of that and be happy simultaneously is just garbage. You’re a good man, Lee. You deserve to find someone who loves you, all of you. All your quirks, all the good and the bad. We all deserve that. Since we were babies, Allison has been my best friend, and I want what’s best for her, so if that truly isn’t you, then so be it. But don’t run just because that is what you’ve always done. If you think you could make something of it with her, then give it a shot. I know she might be mad for me telling you this, but I haven’t seen her as happy as I did for the few months that the two of you were hooking up. She had lost that spark that makes Allison… well, Allison. You brought that back, and I hate that she might lose it again.”

I digest everything that Lindsay just word vomited all over me. I’ve known for a while Allison was special. Hell, I’ve probably known since I crushed on her back in middle school, but I never wanted to ruin the friendship we had.

“Isn’t it better for me to break things off now than to wait months or years down the road when I really break hearts?” I ask, my mind racing with what-ifs.

“Why focus on things ending? What if you give things a go, and you get fifty or sixty happy years together?”

I just shrug my shoulders in reply. She’s got me on that question. If I’m being totally honest with myself, Icansee myself settling down with Allison. Doing the whole marriage and kids thing. But, that part of my brain that loves the bachelor life's freedom throws all the what-if scenarios my way.

“I’m not saying that you need to show up at her house with a ring in your pocket and profess your undying love to her, but showing up with a bouquet of flowers, a pint of mint chocolate chip ice cream with an apology, and a promise to give things a try, might get you back in her good graces,” Lindsay tells me.

“Okay,” I tell her, still digesting everything. “I’ve got some soul searching to do,” I say honestly.

“I’d agree with that statement,” Lindsay says.

“I think I’m going to head home, do some thinking. Thanks for taking care of me last night,” I tell Tucker as I stand from the recliner. I grab the few things that are mine and head for my truck, leaving the two of them on the couch to do whatever happy, in-love people do when left alone.

* * *

I make it home,heading straight for my bathroom to take another quick shower, this time putting on clean clothes now that I’m home. I slip into some sweats and an old, faded T-shirt from my early years at the firehouse. Once dressed, I kick back on my bed and scroll through my Facebook feed. I stopped to look at some pictures my sister posted last night of her and my brother-in-law. They’re on a “babymoon” vacation in California. Seeing my sister so happy puts a smile on my face. Anyone can see how much she loves her husband, just as one can see how much he loves her back. The jealousy hits me out of left field. The reality that Idowant that in my life and not the loneliness I often have when I’m home comes over me.

As much as my house is my sanctuary and a place to just get away from everyone and everything and unplug, it can also be tranquil and lonely.

I pull up Allison’s profile, clicking on the last album she’s uploaded to. I flip through all the images she’s posted in the last few weeks, stopping at one that is of the two of us. It's from not long ago. The night we sat outside Tucker’s place, around the bonfire, talking and laughing for hours. Lindsay or someone else at the party must have snapped it of us, as we’re not looking at the camera, and I don’t remember it being taken. The way we’re looking at each other reminds me of my sister’s pictures. The mutual attraction and chemistry between the two of us almost jumps off the screen. I royally fucked things up; I only hope I can fix it.

16

LEE

Three weeks later

I’m not usuallyone for elaborate, thought-out plans, but I mulled over how I would redeem myself all day. I know I fucked up, so here’s my Hail Mary pass to see if I can recover the biggest fumble of my life.

I take Lindsay’s suggestions to heart, stopping at the florist and grocery store. I buy the largest bouquet they have available before grabbing a container of ice cream, some toppings to go with it, and a wine bottle for good measure.

I didn’t want Allison to tell me not to bother coming over, so I conveniently never texted or called her to ask if I could stop by. I figured grand gestures are supposed to be a surprise, so here I am, pulling into her driveway about to put it all on the line.

I grab my purchases before hopping out of my truck. As I climb the two steps onto her porch, the door opens as Allison fills the doorway.

“Lee,” she greets me, the hesitation lacing her voice noticeable.

“These are for you,” I say, handing over the flowers. “I also brought some ice cream and wine,” I say a bit awkwardly as I hold up the plastic bags from the grocery store.

“Thanks, you didn’t have to bring me anything,” she says, blowing out a breath. She sets the flowers down on a table just inside her door, then takes the bags from me. “Did you come over just to bring me these things, or did you need something?”There's my sassy woman.

“I-I came to apologize. I know I fucked up a few weeks ago, I said things I regret. I was letting my past dictate my future. In a messed up, roundabout way, I was attempting to protect my heart, only to realize in the process, I was simultaneously breaking yours.” I pause to take a break and to let my words sink in as I wait for any kind of reaction from Allison.

The smallest of smiles tugs at one corner of her lips, and that is all I need to know that things are going to be okay. I don’t care how much of a front she puts on or how much she makes me work for it; I know I’m going to win her back.

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