Page 80 of Sweet Like Whiskey

“I think, maybe, it wasn’t so much running away as runningto.”

I nod because that’s exactly it. When I was young, I would watch the seagulls come and go as the seasons changed. I’d watch them fly away. And I’d wonder why they always returned.

I never fit in Maine, not really. I never felt settled there. For as long as I could remember, I wanted to fly away. I wanted to let my wings carry me on the wind and see where I’d land.

I don’t know why it took me so long to do it. To justgo.

“As much as I wouldn’t have believed it,” Nicholas continues, his voice pulling me back to the present—to the mountains and the fresh, saltless air, “this place does suit you. Honestly, I’m not sure why I’m even surprised considering all the country music you used to listen to.”

I make a short sound in the back of my throat. “Neil Young isn’t… You know what? It’s not important. Idolike it here. You’re right about that. Darling feels like home in a way Maine never did.”

He nods slowly,sadly, almost. “I think I was jealous, Ashley.”

That pulls me up short. “Why?”

“Because you left? Because you left me? I felt…”

“Like you were missing out?” I ask.

“Well, yeah. Here you were, being brave, and I was sitting at home feeling sorry for myself. It took me over a week to stop making coffee for two people, and when I finally brewed that single pot and saw how small my life had become, I panicked.”

“Your life isn’t small, Nicholas,” I say as gently as I can. “You have family and friends and a job you love. And I know you’ll be able to find someone to enjoy it with if that’s what you want.”

He nods, smoothing a hand over his face. “Virginia never liked me.”

I hold back my laugh. “She didn’t like youforme. There’s a difference.”

He looks out over the pastures to the west. There are a few cattle far off in front of the mountains, small black dots beneathstormy peaks and a cloudy blue sky. Most of the herd is too far away to even see.

“What now?” I ask.

“I’m heading back tonight,” he answers, meeting my eye. “I’ll tell my mom you look good. She’ll spread the news.”

I huff a laugh. “Take care, Nicholas.”

He nods, pushing out of his seat. “Bye, Ashley.”

As Nicholas rounds the house out of view, I can’t help but wonder if this is the last time I’ll see him. It doesn’t make me sad, not exactly. But there is an ache there. Nostalgia, perhaps, for the good times we shared. Even if Nicholas and I weren’t right for each other in the end, I don’t regret the part he played in my past.

I just know he’s not my future.

I settle back into my seat, waving at one of the ranchers as they pass. They wave back just as a soft voice chimes from beside me.

“Are you in the mood for some company?”

I smile Marigold’s way. “If the company is you? Always.”

Her lips twist in amusement as she takes a seat beside me. Her hair is in a braid today, the end held in place with what looks like a piece of twine. “You’re far too charming for these parts, Ashley. I bet my son hardly knows what to do with you.”

Oh, he knows just fine.

I keep the thought to myself. “He’s charming in his way,” I tell her.

She snorts a laugh. “Mm. You’re kind, too. Don’t get me wrong; I love each and every one of my sons. But we’re all flawed.”

I can’t argue that. Isn’t everyone?

“Are you here to meddle?” I ask.

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