Page 104 of Naughty Nelle

“Girls are silly, Daddy!”

“Yeah, sometimes.”

I thought about playing that silly spoon game with Sarah. I had never had so much fun with a woman. Ever. I desperately wanted to hear her voice. Say her name on my lips. Find out how she was. Eager to call her, I gave Ben an affectionate noogie.

“Hey, bud, you better get some sleep. You know what tomorrow is?”

“My birthday!” he shouted at the top of his lungs.

“That’s right. And I have a big day planned.”

“Did you get me a scooter?”

“You’ll see in the morning.”

Of course, I did. I got him everything he wanted. Though I’d taught him about sharing, kindness, and giving back, I couldn’t help spoiling him. I loved the little guy. More than life itself. He was everything to me. I’d even kill for him. The thought that my ex had almost taken him away from me sent another blast of rage through my veins.

“Daddy, can I ask you one more thing?”

“Shoot.”

“Will you sleep with me tonight so I don’t get scared again?”

I hesitated and then said “sure.” How could I say no?

“Thanks, Daddy.”

He moved to the side, making room for me in his double bed, which was just big enough for the two of us to sleep together comfortably. On my next breath, I kicked off my shoes and crawled into his bed, still in my jeans and T-shirt. Slipping under the fluffy down comforter, my head next to his on a pillow, I smacked a kiss on top of his head.

“Night, bud. Sweet dreams and don’t let the bed bugs—”

“Bite! Night, Daddy!”

Within a few minutes, he was out like a light. Lying on my back, I turned my head and drank in his sweet face, hoping he wouldn’t wake up again in a cold sweat, screaming and thrashing with terror. His Power Ranger toy was clutched under his arm. And under my arm, were Sarah’s shoes. I guess I wasn’t going to be able to call her. With a sigh, I put one of her shoes to my heart and held it there. Sole to soul. I’d known her for less than twenty-four hours, yet the connection I felt to her both emotionally and physically felt more like a lifetime. I took another peek at my peaceful, sleeping little boy. Both his shrink and mine said it had to happen sometime. But I was scared. A woman had scarred us both once and I could never let that happen again. But Sarah seemed different. The big question was: Was I ready? And was Ben ready to have another woman in his life? And then my heart stuttered. Sarah kept running away from me. Maybe none of this was meant to be. That she wanted no part of me. I couldn’t blame her. I was fucked up. A nice, intelligent, pretty girl like her needed someone better. Someone who wouldn’t treat her like a disposable girl toy. And who wasn’t afraid to love.

Still clutching her shoes, I let the darkness blanket me and sleep take over my body and mind. Saarah…Saarah…Saarah. I couldn’t get her out of my head. She was under my skin, and as I drifted off, I felt her in my bloodstream awakening my heart.

---