Page 255 of Naughty Nelle

CHAPTER 26

Iwake up early again the next morning with a pounding headache and my tongue pasted to my palate. How many beers did I drink last night? I stopped counting after the first.

Downstairs in the kitchen, I encounter the last person I want to see. Not Marcella. Gallant!

Given all he went through last night, he looks miraculously good. There’s only a faint bruise on his forehead where Hook whacked him and a small, almost indiscernible gash on his neck from Hook’s sword. But that’s all. Even his blue eyes have regained their clarity. Let’s hope his memory hasn’t.

“I must have fallen off my horse last night,” he says, sipping a cup of that fragrant tea.

Oh shit! He remembers!

“I am sore all over.” He rubs the back of his head. “And I have this bump. But I honestly cannot recall when or where it happened.”

Phew! He doesn’t. I do and turn my head away. After last night, I can’t look him in the eye.

He pours me a cup of the tea.

“After learning how much Calla enjoyed her picnic with you, I have decided I need to spend more quality time with her. So I have planned a special outing.”

Great. He’s going to take her shopping at The Trove. I saw lots of fathers and daughters there.

“We are all going apple-picking this afternoon.”

What?

“It should be great fun.” He finishes his tea. “You, me, Calla, and Marcella.”

Marcella?Great fun? This is what I call misery. Pure misery.

“And perhaps tonight, you can make another delicious apple pie.”

I toss my tea into the sink.

“I can’t wait to go, Papa!” squeals Calla as we finish lunch. She’s already holding a basket with Lady Jane tucked inside.

Marcella, on the other hand, isn’t the least bit excited about apple-picking. She protests it will wear her out for the ball.

“The exercise will invigorate you,” says The Prince.

“My love, picking apples is for peasants.”

Great! Her Royal Skankiness hates apple-picking. Maybe she won’t go.

Her face brightens as she gulps down the last bit of my liquid diet potion. “On second thought, my love, you’re so right. I’ll burn lots of calories and lose weight!”

Dragonballs! She’s coming along. I think of Winnie’s mantra: “Look on the bright side.” An image of Marcella falling out of an apple tree and breaking her neck pops into my head. Maybe it will be fun.

“The coach is waiting,” says Gallant, rising from the table.

Why are we taking the coach when there’s surely an apple orchard on The Prince’s property, only a short walk away?

Inside the coach, Calla and I sit opposite The Prince and Marcella. I gaze out the window to avoid eye contact with Gallant. The bumpy ride does little to calm my nerves.

Calla rattles off her secrets to finding the best apples. The best ones are always on the tree; the “yucky” ones on the ground.

Marcella, bored to death, sips more of her “diet” (Ha!) potion and reads the latest Fairytale Tattler.

“I can’t concentrate,” she grumbles. “Calla, can you please shut up.”

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