Page 54 of Snow Going Back

He turned to face her, surprise lifting his brows as he briefly glanced upwards. Kate’s gaze followed his, and she realised a sprig of mistletoe now hung from the branch of a large tree, just above. As she moved her gaze back to his, a few snowflakes fell from the branch above and danced around them in the breeze, and Kate felt something shift. Their gazes locked, and she stared at him, frozen, momentarily suspended, unable to move either forward or back. They stood there together under the stars in their shared bubble of Christmas magic. But it was more than that, she realised somewhere in the back of her mind. She didn’t let the thought go further. Because it felt good, being in this strange bubble. The air around her seemed to almost tingle withelectricity, and yet at the same time, she felt so relaxed she could barely think.

They lingered there in the silence, Sam’s azure-blue eyes pulling Kate in as though they were a gravitational force. And in that moment, as the gentle music, soft lights and the heady mix of his aftershave and the beautifully decorated pine filled her senses, she wondered, just for an instant, what it would be like to throw caution to the wind and lean in.

As the thought registered, Kate jumped with a small start and pulled in a sharp breath, looking away to the tree. The bubble was shattered, and the feeling of joy and contentment she’d felt just moments before gave way to hot shame and anger. What on earth was she doing?

She put a hand to her head, vaguely aware of Sam turning back towards the tree, too. ‘I, er…’ She wetted her lips, moving her hand to her burning cheek. ‘I think that rum punch hit me harder than I realised. I’m really feeling it suddenly. Feeling really, um, really spaced out.’ It was a thin cover at best, but if Sam saw through it, he didn’t let on.

‘Yeah, Jenna packs that punch a lot stronger than it tastes. The fresh air always brings it home.’ He gestured vaguely around and then pushed his hands down into his pockets, still staring at the tree. ‘We should get out of the cold. That punch don’t just lie about its strength; we’re not as warm as we think we are.’

‘Yes!’ Kate jumped on board the life raft with both feet. ‘You’re right. I actually read about that recently. The added risks of hypothermia when drinking alcohol in cold temperatures because it only gives the illusion of warmth.’

Sam started walking towards the house, and she fell into step beside him.

He glanced at her, looking amused. ‘You read that recently?’ he clarified.

‘Yes,’ Kate answered. Sam chuckled and shook his head, and she frowned. ‘What? What’s funny?’

‘Nothing. You British really don’t get much snow over there, do you?’

Kate narrowed her eyes. ‘Why do you say that?’

‘Because over here we learn basic survival tips like that in kindergarten,’ he replied.

‘Oh, I see. Well, we don’t have the need to learn things like that, no. But if you ever need an expert on how to keep calm and carry on in constant rain, you won’t findanyonemore prepared than a Brit, I can assure you.’

She nodded sagely, and he laughed, the sound much more relaxed now, as they walked away from the mistletoe and the perfectly decorated tree.

‘I’ll be sure to remember that, lawyer girl,’ Sam said seriously. ‘I’m just glad I met you when I did. Who knowswhatI’d have done next time it rained.’

‘Not kept calm and carried on, that’s for sure. At least not well,’ Kate replied. ‘You really are very lucky.’

They exchanged a grin and continued in companionable silence. But although she’d regained her outward composure and had hidden herself well behind the witty banter, inside, Kate was still a confused, mortified mess.

What had just happened? she lamented. She was weeks away from her wedding. And she was a grown woman – anintelligentwoman – one who was in full control of her thoughts and emotions. This wasn’t her. This wasn’t who she was at all.It had to be this place, she decided. With its charm and romantic Christmas displays that people seemed to go all out on popping up everywhere, it was getting to her, that was all. She was off centre, being so far away from home and from everyone. And she’d drunk more than she’d meant to tonight, as well. All of that together was just messing with her head.

Though even if all that hadn’t been true – which itwas– there was one factor to consider that overrode anything. She wouldnevercheat. Not in a million years.Thatshe knew right in her very core. There were certain things Kate had never and would never compromise on, and being able to look herself in the mirror without shame was one of them. She had morals, and she would stick to them no matter what.

But although she knew this, as she slid her gaze towards Sam, she still had to wonder what she’d find in her reflection after tonight. Because whether she’d acted on it or not, and whether she liked it or not, for one brief moment there had been a part of her that had very nearly made a very big mistake.

TWENTY-NINE

The weeks following Matthew’s party passed in a blur, which for the most part Kate filled with paperwork and legalities, trying to keep herself busy and her ever more frantic mother at bay. A lot of the time she was alone, as Sam disappeared sporadically for days at a time to one or another of his projects.

She’d spent time with Jenna in Sam’s absence, too, and had learned a lot from her about the way the business worked and how close different people had been to Cora and William. Each day she’d made a little more progress with Cora’s estate, and each night after speaking to Lance, she’d delved deeper and deeper into Cora’s old diary.

As the year of 1955 had progressed, so had Cora’s predicament. M, the sweet-talking mailman, was no longer working that particular job by the summer and would disappear for weeks at a time. Cora’s entries would become wistful and sad, despite poor William doing his best to cheer her up with treats and trips. But despite Kate’s hopes, M would always end up returning and pull her back in with whispered promises before William had a chance to win her heart over fully. Kate knew it was only a matter of time before he got there though. History didn’t lie.

Eventually Kate couldn’t put off a visit home any longer, her excuses having run too thin to remain believable, and as December arrived, so did her scheduled flight back to London. Her feelings had been mixed as the date had loomed. On the one hand, she was looking forward to going back. It was her home, after all, and she missed her loved ones greatly. But the thought of having to face the reality of the wedding – and get through all the plans they’d made for her to attend with a smile – left her already jagged nerves hanging by a thread.

She flew back on a Friday. Lance met her at the airport and they went for a late dinner, taking some time to catch up properly, then Amy arrived first thing the next morning with a big hug, a detailed itinerary and a tray of double-shot coffees. Though nervous at the sight of the itinerary, Kate knocked her coffee back and pushed forward, determined to make the most of every second with her best friend. She’d missed her hugely.

Frogmarching Kate out of the building, Amy took her to meet Eleanor and Beth, who were waiting with a thick file and a tray of tea in a nice hotel nearby. Kate had barely sat down before Eleanor jumped straight into it.

‘OK, now,Katherine…’ She leaned forward over the table between them with a serious expression. ‘First things first, have you put on anyweightsince you’ve been living in Boston?’

Kate raised her eyebrows incredulously.

‘What?’ Eleanor asked. ‘It’s a valid question! We need to track any changes since you left so we can predict how much it’s likely to change between now and thewedding.’

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