“Your sister did that? Wait, I thought it was a student who had done that?”
“She just graduated from here.” I blinked trying to make sense of it. The guy was older. As if guessing my confusion, he filled in the blanks. “My sister was a happy surprise. Or that’s what my mom liked to call her.” He shrugged. I pressed my lips together.
“The age difference must be hard.” I couldn’t imagine having a twenty-something-year-old sibling. What would we even have in common? My brothers were older, but the difference between the oldest and me was only seven years.
“Meh? Kinda.” He shrugged, but a flash of sadness appeared behind his eyes. “In a way, it was a blessing in disguise. I was more like her dad.”
“Oh?”
“My parents, umm…” He cleared his throat. “They passed right before I graduated from here.” He cleared his throat again. “I took custody of her after that.” The vulnerability in his voice was clear. There was no way he was faking that. And by the way he looked at me, like a deer caught in headlights, I knew he hadn’t meant to share that much, or he wasn’t used to sharing.
I had no idea why I reached for his hand and wrapped mine around his. When our eyes connected, words failed me. I simply squeezed. “That couldn’t have been easy.”
“For either of us.” He swallowed. “I wasn’t the greatest… anything, really. I wasn’t good at the whole helping raise a kid thing. She’d agree, too.”
“But I mean… she graduated college. She put up a little free library around town, a couple of times if I remember right. I don’t think you did a terrible job if she did all that.”
“So, do you have siblings?” He changed the subject yet again.
“Yes. Three older pain-in-the-butt brothers.” I winked. “But good try changing the subject.”
“I wasn’t.” He chuckled. Andres kind of blushed when I shot him a challenging look. “Okay, fine, I was. I’m not used to talking about all that.”
“Not even with your sister?” I was probably prying a little too much. The man had walking red flag written all over him, after all.But in the best way possible, the lust-filled wanton goddess inside of me whispered.Why not get to know him a little better?
“Not even with her,” he admitted, and something inside of me softened. I squeezed the hand I was still holding. Without thinking, I started talking, opening myself to the stranger who had all but admitted he had been following me around.Hadn’t he?
“It happens. Sometimes, we shut the world out to protect ourselves without even realizing, it and when we do, it’s like…” I was at a loss for words. His eyes were gentle on mine, and I wasn’t sure if it was me who leaned in closer or him or the two of us at the exact same time.
“You’re stuck?” he filled in the blank for me. I nodded, unable to breathe or string three letters together. “Like you don’t know how to open up to anyone anymore.”
“Exactly,” I mumbled. Something was happening between us. The air was warmer, thicker. Electricity whispered between us in the most raw and beautiful way.
Suddenly, I felt too exposed.
And awkward. God, I was so awkward! Especially after my divorce.
His eyes deepened, and when his free hand rose between us, I flinched. Something washed over his face.He knows.He knew what I’d been through. What that flinch meant. Embarrassment and self-loathing washed over me like an unwelcome blanket on a hot, humid summer day.
I dropped his hand immediately and crossed my arms over my chest. I opened my mouth to say something, anything, to explain it wasn’t him I was scared of, but the past that didn’t seem to want to let go of me.
But I couldn’t spit out the words, and I felt like an idiot. So, I did the only thing I could think of: I started to walk. For a moment, I didn’t think he was going to follow me. It was stupid; we were both headed in the same direction. After a beat, the heavy sound of his footsteps sounded right behind me. I felt like a jerk. He’d been nice. Opened up to me. And I had flinched when he tried to touch me!Maybe that’s a good thing?It’d keep him away. He’d realize I was damaged goods and quit being there every time I looked up.
But it seemed Andres Montoya wasn’t one to quit that easily.
Before I knew it, he had caught up, walking right next to me. his steps easily matching mine. I didn’t dare look in his direction. If I did, he’d see it. The truth, and the shame that went with it. Nope. No, sir, I was not going to do that. I didn’t date for a lot of reasons, but the biggest was because I didn’t trust myself anymore. I didn’t trust others. Not when my sexual preferences weren’t exactly vanilla. The idea of putting so much control and power in a partner’s hands after my ex… it wasn’t for me.
No matter how much I missed that aspect of my life.
Being single, living my life with Stitch, and the friends I worked with was more than enough for me. Andres didn’t say a word either. He let me be in my thoughts, and not long after that,we were reaching the part where if he really lived behind me, he’d turn. Make a right and head down toward his own place.
But he didn’t.
He simply walked next to me and stopped before I turned to walk down the path to my house.
“You didn’t have to follow me home,” I mumbled softly, my eyes on the ground.God, where is the woman I have been building up?The one who didn’t take shit from anyone. The one who dressed colorfully because she was damned if she would be muted again.
“Carmen, would you like to have dinner with me?” His offer surprised me. I couldn’t stop my gaze when it left the ground and connected with his dark penetrating one.