Page 70 of Those Heartbreak Scars

If this is what Gray needs and Everett wants, then this is what I have to do. Untying the curtains, I hope they provide some privacy.

I turn to Everett.

Stretching his legs, he unzips his pants and wraps his hand around his cock. He gives it a couple of strokes before taking a condom from his wallet and wrapping it. “Straddle me, Lucky Charm.”

My heart is in my mouth. Am I really going to do this?

Everett takes my hand, tugging me closer until I place one knee on the leather. His palm cups my ass and urges me forward.

I’m hyperaware that Gray is watching. His gaze burns into me as my knees sink into the plush cushions.

I wish I could choose him. That he could let his heart heal. I would have chosen him with all my heart. But he wants his job so much, he’s willing to use me to get what he needs.

And I’m letting him. I know it, yet I can’t not do it.

Now Everett is using me too. Or maybe it just feels like it. After this is over Gray and I won’t even be friends. How could we be after tonight?

I can hardly breathe. Can barely keep the tears at bay.

“I didn’t think you would do it,” Everett says, his tone turning softer. His cock is hard against my thigh. “I don’t think he thought you would either.”

I wish I was strong enough to not care that if I don’t do this, none of us will get what we want. But I’m not that person. I care too much about the ashes to burn us all down, despite how uncomfortable this situation makes me feel. If I do this… we all have futures to concentrate on.

Gray will have his career. I will have my relationship with Everett to help me get over my broken heart.

I lock gazes with Gray over my shoulder. My heart pounds.

Emotion wars in his eyes while the rest of him is still and as rigid as a statue. “Rica…”

He’s not supposed to call me that anymore. He doesn’t have permission. The familiarity hurts me. It doesn’t mean what I always hoped it would. It doesn’t mean he wants me.

I turn back to Everett. Raise my voice so that my words come out sharp and clear despite the quaver. “I want something real.”

I want what Gray and I had in those short bursts when we were together, but it doesn’t matter because he doesn’t feel the same.

I glance at him again. Begging him with my eyes to prove me wrong.

He’s not even looking at me. His focus is on his phone.

There’s nothing there for me. I’m never going to be okay, am I?

“Lift up, Lucky Charm,” Everett tells me. “Look him in the eye while you take me. Let him see that you’re mine while I fuck you.”

Gray’s haunted gaze locks with mine. The hurt and anger in his eyes tears me apart. I’m never going to be over him.

I can’t do what Everett is asking of me. This isn’t what I want. I thought… I believed I could forget Gray for the possibility of a future with Everett. I thought if I got through this then all three of us wouldn’t have to be unhappy. And I wouldn’t have to be alone again.

But I would rather be alone than feel like this. Starting a relationship with an ultimatum, with insisting I prove myself in order to gain his love, isn’t healthy. Telling me to fuck him in front of Gray, like he doesn’t care about whether I want to do this, isn’t okay. This isn’t love. Far from it. “Everett, please. I can’t—"

Gray tosses his phone toward us. The cords in his neck stand out. “Get off his lap, Rica. Get off his lap right fucking now.”

I jump. The sharp clattering of his phone hitting the table is like nails on a chalkboard.

Everett grips my hips so tight it hurts when I try to rise. “I don’t think so. She’s my lucky charm. I need her.”

“Let her the fuck up, you piece of shit,” Gray snarls. “This is a bullshit way to treat someone you claim to care about.”

I flinch.

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