Page 39 of Depths of Hunger

“You will obey me, Mia.” His voice rumbles low and threatening. “You will welcome my touch, vampire or not.”

My breath comes in frantic, shallow gasps, and my vision blurs as tears sting my eyes. I’m spiraling, lost between fear, anger, and the remnants of my own desire. “It’s… it’s not the vampire thing,” I gasp, my voice barely audible over the rush of the water. And I realize I’ve spoken the truth.

“Then what is it, my gattina?” Renzo demands, his voice sharp, cutting through the steam like a blade. “Why are you so upset? Why are you fighting me?”

I swallow hard, the words tumbling out before I can stop them. “I just… I just don’t want to be touched. Angelo, he—he grabbed at me, and I feel dirty.” My voice breaks, raw and unfiltered, as I finally give voice to the shame and fear that have been suffocating me. No matter how many showers I take, I feel like the filth will never wash away.

Renzo’s face hardens, his eyes glittering with a fury so intense it makes my heart skip a beat. Rage radiates off him in dark, violent waves, and for a moment, I think he might snap. I shrink back into the corner of the shower, bracing myself for the worst, my whole body tensing as I wait for his inevitable wrath.

“Mia,” he snarls, his voice rough and edged with a barely restrained anger. “Look at me.” He grabs my chin, his grip unyielding as he forces me to meet his gaze. His eyes burn with a fierce intensity, but there’s something else there, too—something raw and unspoken. “Angelo is dead. If I could raise him from the dead, I would delight in killing him a second time, but much more slowly and painfully. He is beyond ever touching you. I will never let any man hurt you ever again. You are safe with me. Do you understand?”

His words are like a lifeline, cutting through the chaos in my mind, and I blink back the tears that blur my vision. Renzo’s voice softens, his grip on my chin loosening slightly as he leans closer, his breath warm against my face. “I will not force you to do anything you don’t want to do,” he says, his lips curling into a brief, almost teasing smile. “At least not in the bedroom.” His face goes serious again, his expression hardening with the weight of his words. “I can’t change whathappened, but you need to know that you are safe. None of this was your fault. You hear me? You are not dirty. You are mine, and no one will ever touch you without my permission.”

I want to tell him that words don’t fix anything, that his promises are just empty comfort, but somehow, his voice cuts through my doubt. It’s as if he’s reached inside me and anchored me to something solid, something real. My whole world has been turned upside down, and I’m still trying to make sense of it, but when Renzo tells me I’m safe, I believe him.

I don’t understand why, but I do.

Renzo picks up the soap again, building a thick lather between his strong hands. He starts at my shoulders, his touch slow and deliberate, and I close my eyes, letting myself sink into the feeling of his hands on me. He moves in smooth, rhythmic circles, washing away the remnants of my fear with each gentle stroke, covering every inch of my skin in soapy bubbles. I feel his strength, his unspoken promise, and for the first time in what feels like forever, I allow myself to relax just a little.

I’m still afraid, still uncertain of what comes next, but as Renzo continues to wash me, the edge of my panic recedes. The water beats down on us, hot and cleansing, and I lean into the sensation, into the quiet comfort of his touch. Renzo is a monster—I know that now more than ever—but right here, in this moment, he’s my monster, and for tonight, that’s enough.

Chapter

Seventeen

Iwake curled up in Renzo’s arms. He held me all night as he promised he would, never trying anything, just keeping me in his warm embrace. It was so heavenly that I don’t want to get up. I want to stay here, blissful like this forever. How he went from monster to savior, I have no idea. My own beauty and the beast story, except I’m no beauty, and he’s all beast.

I know this bliss won’t last. I won’t feel safe here forever. It won’t always be the tender Renzo I met last night who will chase away my nightmares. It will be the Renzo that haunts my nightmares. The vampire that rules my world. I won’t be in control, and I can no longer live with that.

I slip quietly from the bed, careful not to disturb Renzo. The soft, early morning light filters through the heavy curtains, casting a dim glow across the room. My heart is racing, but my footsteps are light as I pad down the hallway to the main bedroom. I quickly grab some clothes, trying to move as silently as possible. The familiar scent of Renzo lingers in the air—a mix of sandalwood and something darker, more dangerous. I rush into the bathroom, shutting the door softly behind me. My hands shake as I dress, pulling on jeans and a light sweater. My mother would yell at me if she could see me. “You alwaysdress so…American.” As if that’s the biggest insult. I stare at myself in the mirror, applying makeup with practiced precision, though my thoughts are scattered.

A text from Pippa had come in earlier—she’d obtained my fake papers sooner than expected and wants to meet for brunch, and I need this. I need to sneak out without Renzo finding out because if he does, he’ll insist on coming along although how he’s supposed to do that when he’s dead, I don’t know. And although I appreciate the comfort he offered me last night, the cold light of day brought reality crashing back. He’s still a vampire and he’s supposed to be dead. I’m still trapped in a world where I have no control. I put the final touches on my hair, brushing it into soft waves, and take a deep breath, steeling myself.

I step back into the bedroom, hoping to slip out undetected, but I come face-to-face with Renzo. He’s standing there in his black boxer briefs, arms folded across his broad naked chest, eyes cool emeralds. Sexy as hell, and twice as deadly.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he asks, his voice calm but laced with authority.

I swallow, forcing a smile. “I’m having brunch with Pippa,” I say, trying to keep my tone light. “It’s been a while since we’ve hung out, and I just need a break. I need something fun.”

Renzo’s eyes narrow, and he takes a step closer, his presence looming over me. “You can’t go out without protection. I want to be with you.”

I let out a frustrated sigh, trying to keep my irritation in check. “I hate to remind you, Renzo, but you’re dead.”Wait, as a vampire, is he undead?I shake away the idiotic thought. “This isn’t exactly the moment you want to come back to life.” I cross my arms, matching his defiant stance. “Besides, it’s just brunch with Pippa.”

Renzo’s jaw tightens, and I can see the struggle playing out in his mind. Finally, he relents, but grudgingly and not without conditions. “Nico and Luca will accompany you. They’re waiting downstairs.”

I curse silently. The last thing I need is Renzo’s brothers shadowing me. But I guess it’s better than having Renzo there himself. “Fine,” I say, my voice clipped. “But they have to sit at a different table. I won’t be able to talk to Pippa with your brothers listening in on every word.”

Renzo’s expression hardens, his teeth clenched. “Fine,” he snaps, “but it will be a very close table, and it will be at a restaurant of our choosing.”

I huff in annoyance. “I’ve already chosen the place. We’re meeting in twenty minutes, so I’m already running late.”

Renzo’s eyes flash with irritation, but his voice is dangerously calm. “Mia, if you want to go, you will follow my rules.”

“Fine,” I say through gritted teeth. “Just let me know what restaurant you want me to meet her at.”

Renzo names the location, and I text Pippa the information. I turn to leave, my frustration simmering just below the surface, but Renzo’s hand shoots out, grabbing my arm in a firm grip. His touch is possessive and dominating, and I’m instantly reminded of the creature I’m dealing with.

“Not so fast,” he says, his voice low and authoritative. “You will do exactly what my brothers tell you to do. You will listen. You will not fight. Am I making myself clear?”

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