Page 96 of Tore Up

Grissele had been surprised when Bane told her that we would pick her up and there was no need for her driver. Although we had been together for the past four weeks, it wasn’t something I’d discussed with her. I’d been waiting on Bane to do that. She was curious, watching us during the drive, and when Bane took my hand when we walked into the doctor’s office, her eyebrows shot up, but she didn’t say a word about it.

Having Grissele laughing and crying while Bane held my hand, squeezing it tightly in both of his during my ultrasound, hadmade me feel even more emotional than I already had been. That baby boy was more loved than I’d ever been, and the joy that brought me was overwhelming.

When that first pregnancy test had come back positive, all I could think was, I was bringing a child into this world that would only have me. I didn’t know if I trusted Crosby to stick around. I didn’t know what to think. But I had wanted to give my child all I had never had, and at that moment, I had known the one thing that was certain was that the baby would be loved by me.

This was so much more. He had a family.

“Halo!” Grissele’s voice called out.

I turned around to see her walking toward me, looking like a fashion model. She always managed to look so perfectly put together. Nothing was ever out of place.

“Hey,” I replied. I hadn’t expected to see her again today.

She glanced over at Slingshot with a soft smile, then back at me. “He is a beauty. A wonderful choice for your first thoroughbred,” she said.

My first? Slingshot wasn’t mine. Maybe she meant my first one to take care of.

“I brought you something,” she said, holding out a light-blue gift bag. “I …” She paused, and there was a shadow of sadness that passed her expression before her smile brightened. “I thought you might like to have this.”

I opened the bag, and there were two things inside. When I picked up the framed photograph that was on top, my chest felt like it might explode as my eyes began to prickle. It was a picture she must have taken yesterday during the ultrasound. Bane stood beside me, holding my hand. I was looking up at him, smiling with tears in my eyes, as he gazed down at me. There were so many things this moment said that it was hard to express in words.

“Thank you,” I whispered, sucking in a breath and smiling as Itried not to cry.

She reached out and squeezed my arm, but said nothing. It was clear she was trying not to cry too.

When she hadn’t mentioned us being together yesterday and Bane not even leaving the room when I changed out of my clothes and into the hospital gown, I’d worried she was bothered by our relationship. This was my confirmation that she was okay with it. She’d accepted it.

I reached into the bag and pulled out a soft blue quilt with the wordCashembroidered on it in silver thread.

“That was Bane’s baby blanket,” she said, and then her smile got a little wobbly. “And Crosby’s. They both came home from the hospital wrapped in it. I thought perhaps you’d want it. The baby would have something that once belonged to his father and also to the man who is going to be his dad.” Her voice cracked on the last word.

The tears I had been fighting back broke free, and I let out a sob as I held the blanket against my chest. Grissele reached up and wiped at her own tears as she sniffled, then laughed.

“This is—” I got choked on my words and had to take a moment. “This is beautiful. It’s perfect. Thank you. He’ll come home wrapped in it too.”

I hadn’t let myself worry about the future. Bane’s actions. The way he looked at me. I felt loved. Cherished. Adored. But he never said he loved me. I never said it to him either. But not because I didn’t love him. I loved Bane so much that my heart felt as if it were going to burst with it most of the time.

The way he spoke was as if he would be there for my son and me, and it was him I saw by my side as I raised the little boy that I’d created with his brother. I wanted more than anything for Grissele’s words to be true. For Bane to be his dad. But I also knew not to hope for too much. To be thankful for every day I had and every moment I spent with Bane.

Grissele took a tissue from her purse and handed it to me, then took one for herself and dotted beneath her eyes as she smiled. “Whew,” she said. “I seem to be doing this a lot lately.”

I dried my face and slipped the tissue into the pocket on my leggings.

“Um,” she said, looking at me with uncertainty in her eyes, “can I hug you?”

I nodded, not so sure I wasn’t about to cry again.

Grissele closed the distance between us, and her slender arms wrapped around me. She smelled of wealth and sophistication, which was probably from a very expensive bottle of perfume.

“Thank you,” she said. “For saving him too.”

I wasn’t sure who she was talking about. Who had I saved?

When she pulled back and looked at me, she seemed to understand my confusion. “Bane. You saved Bane. He was on a destructive path, and I feared I would lose him too. But you brought him back. You were more powerful than all his pain.” She touched my cheek, then stepped back.

“Well, now that I have made us both cry and had my emotional outburst for the day, I will leave you to it,” she said, grinning.

I held up the gifts. “Thank you.”

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