Page 28 of Tore Up

“I assumed you knew that, but then this is Bane we are talking about. Guess he didn’t tell you that either,” Than said to me.

Controlling my emotions the best I could, I opened my eyes and looked back at him. “No, he didn’t.”

Than looked as if he wasn’t sure what to say to me. If he should be apologetic or not.

“Crosby was the youngest son of Fender Cash, the owner of Cash Ranch. It’s the largest thoroughbred stables in Mississippi. Not only that, but the Cashes are connected to important people. Powerful people. They own a lot of things. Crosby was driving his grandfather’s old truck that Fender keeps at the stables to seeyou. That wasn’t his truck, and Crosby wasn’t shoveling horse shit. He was working with racehorses. The buying and selling.”

I sat there, unable to respond. Realization that not only had he been engaged, but it had been to someone from that world, a life of wealth and privilege, and that he had started this thing he had with me to be just a sidepiece. He knew I wouldn’t fit into that life. I had been his walk on the wrong side of the tracks, and he’d accidentally gotten me pregnant.

“You didn’t know any of that, did you?” Than asked me.

I shook my head, unable to look up from my half-eaten sandwich. Humiliation burned in my gut. Bane’s murderous rage hadn’t been because he was some psychopath. He had the safety of his family’s name to seek his revenge. To make my brother pay for taking his brother’s life.

Standing up, I managed to glance at Than while holding my plate close to me. “I, uh … I’m gonna go back upstairs,” I told him, then grabbed my milk and hurried from the room.

I wasn’t sure I wanted to know more about my baby’s father. What I did know was that I couldn’t stay here. He’d never wanted me in this part of his life, and I didn’t want to be anywhere else I wasn’t wanted. I would figure it out. Now that I no longer had to worry about Bane coming to murder me in my sleep, I could focus on getting a job. Finding somewhere to live. Building a life that was secure to bring my child into.

Thirteen

Halo

I have to get away. I don’t know from what, but my legs won’t move fast enough. My lungs burn as I push harder. Glancing back over my shoulder, all I see is the darkness, but it is there. Something is. I wish I knew what or who. A light ahead keeps me from giving up. I can make it there, and then whatever is chasing me will leave.

The light comes fast, and I shade my eyes as I slow my pace because of the brightness. Blinking as my eyes adjust, I see the body on the ground in front of me. The familiar eyes staring up, but not at me. They see nothing. The blankness that only comes with death rocks through me and I let out a bloodcurdling scream.

“Wake up!” a deep voice demanded.

Hands gripped my shoulders and shook me. I opened my eyes, and instantly, the horrific scene vanished. It was replaced by topaz eyes, outlined in thick black lashes. I inhaled sharply at thecontrast of images. Fresh-cut oak, smoke, and a hint of spice hit me.

“Jesus Christ! Do you do this shit every fucking night?” his deep, gravelly voice asked.

Still slightly off-balance from the nightmare and being jerked out of it, I stared at him, trying to remember where I was. The slanted wall, single dresser, bedside table and the scowling expression on Bane Cash’s face.

“No,” I replied. My voice sounded scratchy from overuse, although I’d been asleep.

He removed his hands from my arms, and I shivered, pulling the covers up and not looking at him again. Bane straightened and walked over to stand by the window that overlooked the front yard. It was then I realized he was shirtless, and a pair of gray sweatpants hung on his hips. The tattoos on his back I couldn’t make out in the dark, but they covered a larger portion of it.

“You screamed his name. More than once,” he said, not turning to look at me.

I didn’t remember screaming any name in my dream. Just the running and then seeing … I tried to block that image out.

“I won’t go back to sleep,” I told him. “I’m sorry I woke you.”

He didn’t move. His arms were crossed over his chest, and he seemed focused on something outside the window. “You woke the entire house,” he finally said.

It wasn’t like I could control my nightmares.

“I’m going to leave. Your uncle, or whatever Linc is, was very nice to want to help me, but I was never meant to be in Crosby’s life. I know that now. He had other plans. I can find a job and somewhere to live. I have plenty of time before the baby comes.”

His head swung around to look at me. Even in the darkness, I could see his glower. “You’re not leaving. I thought I’d made that clear.”

This man and his attitude were wearing on me.

“You don’t want me here. Crosby never planned on me being in this part of his life. I don’t belong here.”

He said nothing for several seconds, then walked over to where I’d discarded the extra pillow and sat down with his back against the wall, using the pillow for padding behind his head and back.

“Go to sleep,” he said gruffly.

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