Page 57 of Absentia Mori

I will not claim the poor little rich girl narrative, even now. But I have to be honest with myself. I have to come to terms with the fact that all that money couldn’t protect me from the terrors in the dark. In fact, my father’s money and status made it easier for the monsters to get in. My legacy is poison. And it’s left so much blood on my hands.

But Penny Blackwell will soon learn that she fucked up thinking she could make me disappear. I’m no one to fuck with.

I’m Libra fucking Thorn.

I can’t help but chuckle.

The guys look at me, waiting to be let in on the joke. I glance around the parking lot full of hearses. “Looks like we’re riding back to Tenebrose the way we came in.”

Raithe and Fabien burst out laughing.

“With coffins full of poison and gin. How fitting,” Mordecai adds with a smirk.

The streets of Raven’s Gate are covered in leaves—brown, gold, and green. The air is crisp, and whispers of All Hallow’s Eve carry in between the wisps of wind. I hang my head out the window of the hearse and drink it in with every breath. I’ve missed so much…

My cell phone sits dead in my lap. But I’m in no hurry to get it charged. The second it lights up, I have to let the whole world back in. And I’m not ready. I tuck it back into the garbage bag with the rest of my belongings. Fabien spotted it when they were loading up the poison and gin from the supply room. Luckily, the diamond bracelet Aries gave me was still in there. I put it back on as soon as I saw it. It’s the only tether I still have left to my twin.

I miss his face, his laugh, and how looking into his eyes is like looking into a mirror. He’s the boy version of me. My twisted other half. I can only imagine the destruction he’s caused in my absence. I’m the only one who can ground him. If he thinks I’m dead, he’ll have no reason to keep his demons in check. I twist the bracelet around my wrist, wondering if he can feel me from wherever he is.

“Do you hate us?” Mordecai grumbles as he drives. It’s odd seeing him—all three of them—outside the asylum. They were my monsters. And yet, somehow, they saved me.

“No. I never did. You still hate me?” I still don’t know where I stand with them. We fought side by side, but we were desperate to get out of there. Now that we’re free, what reason do they have to stay with me?

Mordecai shakes his head. “No. I hate what they’ve made us.”

The familiar path through the woods that leads from Absentia Asylum to the center of Raven’s Gate has me on edge as much as it comforts me. We are from the same world but on two separate sides of it. Under the light of the moon, those differences and challenges become more apparent. They might not hate me anymore, but I can’t imagine them wanting anything further to do with me. I’ll always be that spoiled little rich girl in their eyes.

“Pull over at Angel’s Trumpet. I need a drink.” I look like hell, and for the first time in my life, I don’t give a fuck.

“We’re still covered in blood, baby girl,” Fabien drawls.

I shrug. Angel’s Trumpet is a dive bar—the town shithole. “They’ve seen worse there.”

Raithe chuckles from the seat behind me. “Already feeling more like your old self, are you?”

If he’s referring to the fact that I spent most of my life acting as if I was far superior to others, then he’s severely mistaken if he thinks I’m slipping back into that.

I whip around in my seat so I can look at them both. “I’ll never feel like who I used to be ever again. I just don’t give a fuck what anyone thinks of me anymore. Blood or not.”

That shuts them up.

Fuck. I’m exhausted and starving for food that isn’t mushy and flavorless. Bile rises in my throat just thinking about that slop they made us eat. I take a deep breath through my nose and try to calm my sour stomach.

Mordecai looks at me for the first time since we hit the road. “Nothing a little whiskey and a cheeseburger can’t cure.”

I nod. I’m craving a hot shower, too, but not before I’ve devoured my weight in French fries and alcohol. “Exactly,” I mutter.

He parks the hearse on the side street next to the bar. It must be a weeknight because I don’t spot the usual crowd of bikersmixed with college kids spilling out onto the sidewalk. I let out a sigh of relief. The quieter, the better.

But my stomach is in knots. And not just from hunger. We made promises and declarations back in the asylum. Admonitions made under stress and the need for survival. I can’t help but wonder if they regret making them now that I have targets on my back.

“What’s on your mind, little freak?” Mordecai kills the engine and leans against the driver’s door.

I white-knuckle the garbage bag in my lap. “I-I don’t want any of you to feel obligated to me. You don’t owe my family anything. I’m grateful you helped me get out… but this isn’t your fight. You’re free. I’ll understand if you want to walk away.”

The three of them exchange long, lingering looks for what feels like forever. Finally, Raithe lets out a grunt as he squeezes my shoulder. “We’re not going anywhere without you, doll face.”

Fabien chuckles. “Yeah, you’re fucked, Libra. You’re stuck with us.”

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