Page 82 of Absentia Mori

If I hadn’t been captured by Penny Blackwell, I would’ve woken up hungover in Hemlock Valley with enough self-loathing to fill an entire poison field. I was on a path of destruction, a category five downward spiral. I was letting my demons control me like a puppet. I didn’t just break out of the asylum, I broke away from a life that was eating me alive.

Now I can start to rebuild the relationships I took for granted and finally cut ties with my father. He can’t control me anymore. Not without my consent. And I refuse to give him any more of myself. Not having his money to fall back on feels pretty fucking good actually. I was more alone when I had it, anyway.

Fabien squeezes my hand, bringing me back to the present. “You sure about this, doll face?”

I swallow down the lump in my throat as we stand in front of the large iron gates. “At least we’re going in the front door this time.”

He rubs a tattooed hand over his shaved head, arching his brows. “Just you and me?’

Fabien isn’t scared of anything that I’m aware of, except this place. Which is why we need to go back in.

“Mordecai and Raithe aren’t attached to the ghosts like we are. They didn’t connect with them. For some reason, we did. You’re the one who figured out how to calm Kitty and you could get the Terror Twins to do just about anything for you. And Rowena… she helped me. It should just be us.” I wipe my sweaty palms down the front of my jeans.

He chuckles. “I don’t know which one of us is crazier—you for dragging me back to this shithole, or me for letting you.”

I’m not afraid anymore. The monsters are gone, Penny Blackwell is dead, and if I somehow go missing again, this will be the first place everyone will look. I take the bolt cutters from Fabien and get to work on the chains that wrap through the gates. They’re rusted and weathered so that should make it easier to slice through.

After a few minutes of huffing and puffing and fighting with the metal, Fabien laughs and takes over. “Come on now, beautiful. What’s the point of dating a freakishly strong psycho if you can’t use him to break into haunted asylums?”

I laugh and concede, stepping back so he can get to work. “Dating? I think we’re past that now.”

He shoots me a wink as the thick metal chains crack and fall away from the gates. “I do need to take you on a proper date come to think of it. Maybe we’ll have a picnic in the courtyard. For old time’s sake.”

A tiny spasm flickers in my core as I remember that night they tied me to stakes in the ground and tortured me. It had the opposite effect they were intending.Because I’m a sick freak like them.That night brought all my darkest cravings to light. It was a baptism of sorts.

I push through the creaky gates and throw him a sly smirk. “Don’t threaten me with a good time unless there’s ropes involved.”

He picks the chains back up off the ground. “Should I grab these for later then?”

I snort-laugh at the mischievous look in his eyes. “I seriously can’t take you anywhere.”

He laughs back but as soon as we reach the front doors of the asylum, his eyes darken and he purses his lips. He holds a large knife in one hand while shielding me back with the other. “Just in case we didn’t get all of them.”

I nod. A slight trickle of fear threatens to send me into a panic if I don’t swallow it down quickly. He’s right to be on guard, but deep down I know that the only things left in this place are ghosts.

And the dead can’t hurt us. Not like the living can.

It takes Fabien less than a minute to break the lock on the front doors. They’ve been closed for so long, it takes both of our strength to pry them open. I grip my own knife as we creep inside.

I flinch as a half-hanging light fixture swings above us, casting that gross green tint on our skin. The wind outside is strong today, blowing it from side to side.

“Why are we doing this exactly? I know you’re a glutton for punishment but this is another level,’ Fabien whispers as if we didn’t murder the entire staff here.

I stalk down the main hall, a part of the asylum I haven’t seen before. “I made a promise to the dead. They need to know that it’s truly over. Penny is gone and can’t hurt them anymore.”

As we make our way back to the wing we were kept in, my stomach knots. I breathe through my nose and count to ten, assuring myself that there’s no need for flight or fight responses. We’re safe. No one can hurt us here anymore.

Fabien white-knuckles the hilt of his knife. With his shoulders hunched, he flexes his forearms, mirroring my own tense muscles. “No offense, but I’m glad you got locked up in here. This place sucked a lot less once you arrived.”

I can’t help but chuckle. “I’m glad the three of you were here too. I don’t think I’d survive by myself.”

“Have you met you?” he teases. “We just distracted you from murdering everyone sooner. You would’ve been just fine, Libra Thorn.”

A strange warmth fills me at his admission. It’s an odd compliment but one I don’t take lightly. But the atrocities we committed in here are nothing compared to the things we’ve done to each other.

I clasp his free hand in mine. “I would have found a way out of here on my own. But I’m happy I didn’t have to. Fabien… I’m obsessed with you. Is that love?”

He slips his arm around my waist and pulls me to his chest. “It is for us. That’s all that matters.”

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