Page 99 of Once Kissed

I shake my head. I mean to tell him to please wait, and to give me a moment, but I know if I speak now, I’ll only cry. He places his arm around me and kisses my head.“Baby,”he says.

His choice of words makes me clasp my mouth to hold back my sobs. Good God, I can’t believe this is happening.

Curran doesn’t say anything more until we reach his apartment and he’s shut the door tight. Despite the tears blurring my vision, I make it to the couch and sit. He lowers himself beside me. For all his distress, he keeps his voice quiet. “Is this about your dad? Did he do something to you? You need to come clean and tell me what he did.”

“It’s not about him,” I assure him. At least, not yet. But I know Father would make it about him if he knew. “It’s about me.”

“Are you sick? Jesus, don’t tell me you’re sick.”

I clutch his hand when he reaches for me. “I’m not sick, Curran.”

“Then what could be so bad? Did you get your grades?”

I nod, grateful for the momentary distraction. “I received them a few hours ago. I didn’t think my final debate went well, but my professor emailed me to tell me I received the highest score in my class.” I release a shaky breath. “In fact, I excelled in all my exams and made high honors.”

Curran’s entire face lights up before he seizes me in a tight embrace. “Holyshit.”

I cry against his chest, my fear, excitement, and shock releasing all at once. “The head of the department emailed earlier to congratulate me, and to inform me that I’m graduating in the top three percent of my class.”

“Tess, that’s awesome. I’m so proud—”

“And I’m pregnant.”

It’s as if he dies, right there against me. Curran doesn’t move, nor does he breathe.

The burden of my secret releases every emotion burning its way into my heart. I don’t have a best friend to confide in, or a mother to speak to. The only person I have is Curran.

I wait for words of comfort that never come, or possibly even disappointment and anger. But in the silence-filled minutes that pass, I start to fear the worst. Very carefully, I inch away to meet his eyes.

Curran doesn’t meet me with his “cop” face. He’s not angry. Isn’t sad. Isn’t anything. He simply sits there, blinking, his expression absent of any emotion.

I clasp his hands as they fall away from me, squeezing them to remind him that I’m still here. He doesn’t squeeze back. His hands simply lie as unmoving as the rest of him. I allow them to slip from my grasp and release yet another breath. “I need you to say something.”

He swallows hard. “I thought you were on the Pill.”

I lift my glasses and wipe a tear away with my fingertips. “Okay. That wasn’t it.”

He leans forward and rubs his eyes. “Sorry, I just…How did this happen?”

I stand and start pacing. “We’ve had a lot of sex, Curran. There’s a reason the Pill is considered only ninety-nine percent effective.” Not to mention, my periods were always irregular. When I missed one, I didn’t think much of it. But when I missed it again…

I glance back at him. “Okay…okay,” he answers. I think he’s going to say more, but once again, the silence stretches between us.

The seconds turn to minutes before he speaks again. “I think I can switch to full-time nights when I’m back on the force and make more money. I say you snag a job right away. We’ll bank everything you make, along with the extra I’ll pull in. But when the kid comes, I want you home. A year, maybe longer if we plan it right.”

He rubs his jaw, appearing to think aloud. “I can probably get enough from the sale of this place to buy us a house outright—it’ll be small, but leave us enough to invest in that parking deck me and my brothers plan to buy. Between the revenue it’ll bring in, and my job, we’ll eventually get a bigger place and still have a good sum to retire on.”

He glances out the window. “I want something with a big yard so he can run around, and I can teach him to play catch—or her. Wren has a great throwing arm—why not a girl, too, right?”

This time, it’s my turn to simply stare. I can barely find my words. “Ah, right.”

Curran closes the short expanse separating us, laughing a little. “Ma’s going to lose her mind—seeing how this here’ll be the first grandkid. Thing is, we’ll need to find something pretty quick so I can get the nursery ready. Paint it. That sort of thing.” He stops talking when he gets his first good look at me. “Why you crying?”

I shake my hands out. “I’mthatgirl.”

He places his hands on my hips and draws me to him. “What girl?”

“The one who gets knocked up.”

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