Page 36 of Feel Me

Bethany’s little son grins at me, showing off his bottom teeth and flapping his arms. I kneel on the floor with them and sign to Bethany.Can I hold him?

Of course, she motions, turning Peyton toward her.Do you want to go to Aunt Melissa?

Like Bethany, little Peyton was born with severe hearing loss. Already he seems to understand a great deal. He angles around to face me, offering a sweet smile and reaching for me when I hold out my arms.

“Oh, sweet boy,” I say, gathering him to me.

I love babies: the way they coo and smile, and their total innocence completely melts me. Sometimes, though, I grow a little sad being around them. It’s not that I’ve given up on marriage and family, but working where I work, and doing what I do, makes it impossible to meet a potential baby daddy.

A knock on the door has me looking up. “Hey,” I say when I see Declan standing there.

Okay . . . maybe not completely impossible.

He grins back at me, reassured I’ve given him the smile he likes, the one that means “I haven’t pissed you off today” as he puts it. Funny thing, he doesn’t piss me off. We don’t always see eye to eye, and sometimes we go back and forth before we reach an agreement, or at least find common ground. But . . . things are better between us. I sigh at the way his light blue dress shirt brings out his eyes. No, they’re a lot better.

“I don’t want to interrupt your meeting,” he says, his eyes sparkling as if on cue. “But I have a meeting in another half hour, and I need you to sit in on it.”

I cuddle Peyton closer, rubbing his small back. Today is a little easier to keep my smile having this sweet baby so close, regardless of where I see this conversation going. Most days, though, are harder. Declan and I have handled too tough many cases lately, all surrounding horrific circumstances, forcing us to work late. Between my Dad starting chemo and hardly any time to myself, I’m ready to snap. And if it weren’t for Declan, I likely would.

Declan has completely chiseled his way into my heart. Just two months ago, I wouldn’t have believed he could. I viewed him like so many politicians I interact with, an overly inflated ego stuffed into a suave suite, driven to succeed no matter who it harmed. Now, I can’t find any joy until I see him.

“Does this case involve ‘R’?” I ask.

Bethany is too busy looking at Declan to read my lips, but I have to keep things confidential. He gives me a stiff nod, his smile vanishing. I let out a sigh. Rosana called me crying the other day and told me her mother’s pressuring her to drop all charges against Iker. I reassured her that she has our full support and counseled her on the phone until she calmed. If Declan is meeting with them this whole thing is getting ugly.

“I’ll be there,” I assure him.

“Thanks, Mel,” he says. He nods to Bethany who incidentally can’t stop gawking at him.

Who’s that?Bethany signs.

I perch Peyton on my lap.Acting District Attorney Declan O’Brien, I sign. I’m doing my best to appear casual, but the size of my grin gives me away.

How long have you been seeing each other?

I lower my chin to kiss Peyton’s head and give my face a moment to cool.We’re not dating, I motion.We’re simply colleagues.

Colleagues don’t stare at each other like they want to take each other’s clothes off, Bethany responds.

That’s not how I was looking at him, I insist, even though that’s pretty much how I look at him every time we’re alone. But if Bethany, who doesn’t know me well, can see right through me, who else knows I’ve fallen for Declan as hard as all those women I used to make fun of?

I think you found who you need, she signs.

I think you’re reading way too much into this, I tell her.

It’s what I say, but I already know she’s right.

My long floral skirt bats against my legs as I swoop into Declan’s office. “Hi,” I say.

His suit jacket is hanging on a hook behind him and about ten case files are spread across his desk. “Hey,” he says, smiling despite the hot mess in front of him.

Instead of taking a seat in front of him, I walk around to stand beside him, crossing my arms as I skim through the file names. All are particularly violent cases and require immediate attention. “You have to reassign these, don’t you?”

He nods. “Curran ripped into me for giving Tess three of them, claiming she’s pregnant and I shouldn’t be giving her cases like this.”

Curran is only watching out for Tess, but Declan and I are watching out for all these victims. “And how is Tess taking it?”

He rubs his jaw, like he does when he’s troubled. “She assures me she’s ready and up for the challenge.” He drops his hand away. “But she’s one person. I need Carmichael and Saunders to handle the rest, but they’re greener than Tess.” He shakes his head. “These cases are complex and will likely go to trial if we can’t agree on plea. I’m giving each two. I can’t handle them all myself. And if I give them more, I don’t think they’ll last the remainder of the year.”

---