Page 20 of Only With You

Who the hell is Roxy? I’ve never hit anyone. Granted Landon makes me feel violent, but I’d never hit another girl and never for a guy.

“When?”

“How?”

“Is she okay?”

“Was it bad?”

I want to go out there and defend myself, but I freeze when Jagger stops them from asking more questions.

“Oh yeah, she’s fine. It happened freshman year, during move-in day.”

“Oh,” they say in sync, sounding confused.

“Wait, I’m lost. Julianna, our Julianna, hit Landon’s car?” Polly questions.

Oh, Roxy is the name of his car. I smile at that, but realize what I’m doing and stop.

“Yes, she hit his car, and when the police showed up, she pinned the blame on him and made it all about her. She got away with it and Landon got a ticket and had to pay the damages for his car.”

“Oh,” they say again, but this time, disappointment laces their voices.

I remember that day as if it were yesterday and regret how things turned out. I know it was all my fault, but in the moment, I was so angry, upset, and empty. I took out my rage on him.

Once everything I was feeling wore off, I realized what I did and felt extremely guilty. I found him using the information on the copy of the ticket I got. I was ready to apologize and pay for all the damages. That’s until he spilled his drink all over me at a party.

I still remember the way the corner of his lip curved just slightly upward. The way his eyes shone with malice, and when he looked me dead in the eyes and said, “That.Thatwas my fault.”

He walked away like nothing happened, while I stood there drenched and those around who saw, laughed.

I should defend myself and tell them why I acted the way I did, but flashbacks of arguments I had with Sienna stop me from doing so.

They probably won’t want me here anymore and I can’t say I blame them. Maybe they’d be better off if I left.

6

JULIANNA

I should behappy that the weekend’s finally here, but all I feel is overwhelmed. Exhaustion is wearing down on me, my muscles feel like they’re on a tight coil, my head aches painfully, and my body doesn’t feel like mine.

This week has kicked my ass and I don’t even know where to begin.

Since Roberts took over, the syllabus Professor Ellis created has been thrown out the window. I knew better than to believe he would follow it, but I held onto hope.

I’m pretty sure it was never his plan to follow it despite him saying he would on Monday.

He stated today that every Friday he’ll be giving us quizzes to test us and to make sure we’re understanding the material. I didn’t do so well. Out of the ten questions, I got six right.

The only thing still keeping my grade floating above a D is the homework, but for how long, I don’t know. It’s only worth a small percentage of our overall grade.

Though, failing isn’t the only thing that’s been weighing down on me after overhearing the conversation on Monday. The girls haven’t said anything to me, but then again, I haven’t given them a chance to confront me.

I’ve been working every single day at the museum, and when I’m not there, I’ve stayed at El’s apartment. It’s a cowardly thing to do, but I can’t bear to see the disappointment and anger on their faces.

I’m not sure if they’re the kind of girls who will give me the silent treatment or do something petty. I’ve had the pleasure of experiencing both when I lived at the sorority house. It’s why I had to get out.

Now, I might have to do it again.

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