Page 207 of Only With You

“She changed sophomore year. We stopped talking and hanging out, but on Halloween night, she wanted to get together. It was so random, but I didn’t question it, because I thought she wanted to fix things.” I break out into a cold sweat. “What did the text message say?”

He tenses. “Are you sure you want to know?”

“Yeah,” I weakly say.

“Cole texted Sienna that night and told her he saw her pouring something in your drink. She denied it at first, but then confessed. He said he wouldn’t say anything if he could get you alone.”

I clench my teeth, refusing to let the tears building up spill. “Did she say why she did it?”

He kisses the top of my head. “She wanted you kicked out of the sorority.”

I close my eyes, letting the tears fall.

Landon doesn’t say anything but holds me, knowing that I don’t need words right now. I just need to be held. I just need him.

Love: Just text me if you need anything, and I’ll leave. I don’t need to be here.

I smile, stifling a yawn.

Last night was rough. After crying my eyes out, I couldn’t fall asleep because my head was hurting. So Landon—even though he doesn’t care to talk about Haptic—asked me questions about him and let me talk his ear off about the romance song theory. Then, he suggested we slow dance to make up for not going to semi. It did make me feel better, but I felt bad for stepping on his feet. He didn’t complain or show that it bothered him.

Then we cleaned up my room and I watched him do his night routine.

It pains me to know the reason he needs things around him to be spotless. He said living with his mom was a nightmare, because she wasn’t the cleanest, so messes trigger and overstimulate him. He also said it’s how he feels the most useful, something he knows he can’t fuck up. So he insisted he needed to clean alone.

My heart sank at his admission, and as much as I wanted to hug him, I didn’t because I could tell he felt overwhelmed sharing that. Instead of letting him do it alone, I suggested we do it together.

I know he’ll never forget, but maybe doing something different will help replace the bad memories. I’m sure that’s not how it works for him, but it’s worth a try.

It took a little adjusting and me reminding him that we’re doing it together for him to let me help. He still ended up doing most of it, but baby steps.

Afterward, he ate a bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, worked on his music, and played a little on my piano. He involved me in it like he usually does, but I typically like to stay quiet because I know it’s what he needs.

I know he’s gone through a lot, so the routine helps him cope with stress.

Me: Pretty sure Coach Warren said it was mandatory team breakfast.

Love: He’d understand but either way you’re important.

Me: Remember when you said you gave half a fuck about me?

Love: Yes because you were a pain in the arse then and you’re still one now.

Me: Still? Careful there, you’re lucky I agreed to date you. You might find yourself without a girlfriend.

Love: Is that a threat?

Me: I don’t know…you tell me.

I muffle my laugh, looking up to see that the Uber driver has pulled into the sorority house and parked.

Me: I’m here but I’ll text you as soon as I’m out. I love you.

Love: I love you.

I don’t think I’ll ever get over knowing he loves me.

“I shouldn’t be long.” I meet the driver’s eyes through the rearview. They crinkle at the corner and she nods with a smile.