Page 156 of Only With You

“There’s nothing wrong with having this once in a while. Besides, we’re celebrating you.” I hold the piece of bacon in front of her, but she stares at it with hesitation. “Come on, Love. You know you want to.”

That pulls a diminutive curve on her lips, and I swear my heart expands. I don’t know what it is about the way her lips stretch just a bit that stirs something within me, but it just does.

She takes the piece and I grab another, dip it in the syrup, and simultaneously, we take a bite.

“That’s good.” We say at the same time.

I pick up the bowl of syrup and pour it over my pancakes. I have no idea what’s in it or how it was made, but this shit is good.

She giggles as she chews. “I’d never lead you astray.”

“I know you wouldn’t. Remember, you lead and I follow.”

Her gaze strays to my lips and stays there, and it’s when I realize I’m smiling.

“I don’t want to sound like a double standard. I hate when people, particularly men, tell me to smile because it’ll make my day better, or because it’ll make me look prettier.” She grimaces. “But I really meant what I said that other night. I really like your smile, and I hope you do it more often, but of course, only when you want to.”

“Don’t do that!”

The strike of Mum’s palm against my cheek comes abruptly. It takes me a moment to register what she did, but it isn’t until I feel something warm trickle down my chin. When I touch it and raise my palm, blood coats my fingers.

“You made me do that! I told you not to smile, Landon. You know how it makes me feel. Why would you do that to me? Can’t you see the pain that godforsaken man who calls himself your father did to me?”

Us, I want to correct her, but instead, I wipe the blood off my lip, force air into my lungs, and stiffly nod. “I’m sorry, Mum. I won’t do it again.”

I was eight the first time she hit me.

Knowing there’s hardly anyone here because it’s late and we’re sitting in a booth gives me the courage to tell her.

“You remember how I told you my mum checked out after John left? She didn’t just check out. I’m pretty certain she had a psychotic break.” I pause as the memories of her disrupt my thoughts like an unexpected tsunami. “And me being around her, looking so much like John, was a reminder of what she lost, what she wanted but couldn’t have. It pained her to see me smile because she missed him. So I stopped, and I guess I’ve never had the need to do it since then. I don’t tell you this because I want your pity.” I shove those idiotic feelings away.

“I’m telling you because, well, if I’m being honest with you, I hate it, too. I hate that I look like him and…I’m sorry, this is not about me. This is about you. I’m sorry, I?—”

She shakes her head, grabbing my free hand before I can retract it. “No, no, I don’t mind. I’m here for you, Landon.” She squeezes my hand. “Thank you for trusting me and I promise you can always confide in me.” She rubs gentle circles on the top of my hand. “I’m always here for you, okay?”

The heavy weight in my chest lifts, making it a little tolerable to breathe. “Okay.”

“I love it.”

“Hmm?”

“I know you said you hate it, but I love your smile. I’m sorry I was forcing you to do something you weren’t comfortable with.But I just want you to know that nothing is going to change how much I love seeing it and when your dimples make their grand appearance. That’s all I have to say, but I just wanted you to know.”

Heat crawls up my neck to my cheeks and my lips stretch involuntarily.

She must have a great read on me because she squeezes my hand one more time before she lets go of it and changes the subject.

“So, aren’t you curious to know what I wrote on your neck?”

I’m happy for the shift in the conversation, but not her moving her hand away.

“I have an idea, but please enlighten me.”

She smiles mischievously. “It’s honestly really cute, some of my finest work. It’s angel wings with my initials between the wings and a halo above them.”

“Of course you’d do something like that.” I cut into my pancakes and stuff them in my mouth but pause mid-chew when I notice something glimmer in her eyes. “What?”

“Let’s make a bet.”

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