Page 120 of Only With You

Spawn of Satan: Every part of you is safe with me.

I can’t deny that something shifted Tuesday night, but I won’t pretend or make myself believe that everything has changed between us. Once the semester ends, things will probably go back to how they were. It’s better if I keep that mentality, because the last thing I want to do is to get my hopes up.

“Does that mean we’re going to talk about you and Micah?”

Disdain covers her expression. “We dated in high school. We broke up. The end.”

I study her for a moment and note the hurt that crosses her face before she masks it with a smile.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t?—”

She shrugs indifferently. “It’s okay, it happened. We’re done.”

“I’m here if you want to talk.” I squeeze her hand.

“I know,” she replies, eyes glittering with excitement. “So, come on, Tuesday. What the hell was that all about?”

I debate whether I want to tell her or not, but there’s no one I trust more than El. And I know she’s not going to judge me, so with a nervous chuckle, I tell her almost everything. Minus what Landon shared with me and the Cole incident.

I promised I wouldn’t say anything and I meant it. I just wish he wouldn’t feel the need to keep that to himself. I hate the thought of him being around something that triggers him.

She stares at me with bewilderment and jaw hanging open.

“Stop looking at me like that. Say something.”

She blinks and laughs maniacally, clapping her hands together. She jumps on my bed, shaking my arm eagerly. “Holy shit! I knew it! I knew it! I knew you two would eventually?—”

“Shhhh.” I take a hold of her arm, getting her to stop moving. “Don’t be so loud. The girls don’t know.”

Like El, they’ve been curious and seem a little too excited about there potentially being something more. I don’t want them to get their hopes up. It’d also be weird telling them about our little exchange.

“Sorry, sorry,” she whispers, then squeals into her hands like a child. “I’m sorry, but I’m excited for you.” She softly claps her hands and does a little dance.

I fiddle with the sleeves, pulling them over my hands. “So, you don’t think it’s weird that we’re…thatI’mexchanging sex for tutoring? And send him pictures?”

They weren’t nudes but they almost could’ve been.

“Weird that you’re making the best out of a situation with a guy who happens to be insanely hot and sounds like thatguy who’s singing? Wait.” Her eyes grow in size and sparkle. “Imagine if Landon could sing.”

“I wouldn’t put it past him. You should have seen the way he played the piano. He said it was the first time playing that song and he learned it all by just listening to it when I would play it.”

I wonder what other talents he has hidden.

She gives me a smug smile.

“Don’t look at me like that. We’re just having fun.”

She hums thoughtfully, but then shrugs. “Well, I’m happy for you. You deserve it.”

“So you don’t think it’s weird or wrong at all?”

“It’ll be weird and wrong if you don’t do it. As long as he’s treating you well, respecting your boundaries, and not making you uncomfortable, I don’t see why it would be, unless you don’t want it. Then definitely don’t do it, because you should also enjoy it. Do you not want to? Because that’s totally fine if you?—”

“No, no, I do want it. I feel really comfortable with him.” My face heats and I look down when my lips pull upward.

El giddily giggles just as we hear Polly shout for us to come out.

“Remember, not a word,” I warn as we walk out of my bedroom.

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