Page 31 of Second Chances

“Can you pass me the potatoes please before you take them all?” Pete holds his hand out to his daughter, Sophie, as she shovels more and more of the roasted King Edward’s onto her plate.

“But…” Sophie pouts. “I’m hungry.” It’s been a few months since Sophie and Grayson formally announced her pregnancy, and after some initial concerns, everything seems to be progressing well now.

“I think seven potatoes is enough.” Grayson takes the bowl from his wife and hands it to his father-in-law.

“Spoilsports.” Sophie pouts again as Grayson hands her the brussels sprouts.

“Have these instead. Lots of iron for the baby.”

“Yuck.” Sophie wrinkles her nose. “Mum, they’re trying to get me to eat disgusting stuff again.”

“It’s good for you and the baby. Grayson, give her seven to match the potatoes.” Miranda calls from the kitchen where she’s busy preparing a second batch of gravy with Amy’s help.

“Mum!” Sophie protests and everyone around the table laughs.

I can’t though. The jovial atmosphere catches in my throat and the need to cry brings tears to my eyes.

“Elena?” Ryan reaches over from his seat next to me and wraps his hand around mine, which is gripping tightly onto a fork. “Are you ok?”

My bottom lip quivers as I continue to watch Sophie mock slap Grayson’s hand away from her plate as he desperately tries to add brussels sprouts to it.

“Please excuse me.” I pull my hand away from his and drop my fork as I push the chair back rapidly and run from the room to the bathroom.

“Elena!” Ryan shouts after me, and I hear the legs of his chair scrape against the marbled floor as well.

I don’t stop though until I’m safely in the confines of the bathroom with the door locked.

I’ve never experienced a family dinner before, and it’s shown me how much I’m on my own. Dinner with my mother is her lecturing me about my failures. My father is gone, and I don’t have any brothers or sisters. The North family is massive, and they all adore each other. I can see how much they’ve embraced Ryan’s return to them. Miranda and Pete are the parents I want. I can’t help it—I’m so stupid. I drop down so my back is leaning against the door and pull my knees into my chest, wrapping my arms around them and hugging them closely. I let the tears fall. Why is it so hard to have a normal family? The Norths have been through so much, but they support each other every day. If one of them needs something, they’re all there and standing up for each other. I asked my mother once to come and watch the first end of term show Amy had allowed me to organize all on my own. She looked at me as though I’d grown two heads and was speaking gibberish. I’ve never asked again. In stark contrast, Miranda attends every one of the performances even though her daughter-in-law no longer choreographs them.

A soft knock sounds.

“Elena.”

Ryan’s baritone voice comes through the oak of the door.

“I need you to open this door.”

I try to control the quiver in my voice. I know Ryan is my boyfriend, but we’ve only been dating a short while. I don’t want to bother him with mundane things such as my relationship with my mother when he’s still trying to come to terms with his own childhood. It wouldn’t be fair.

“Just a minute. I’m washing my hands.”

I push to my feet and turn the tap on at the sink. The cold water runs over my hands, and I splash it on my face to try and disguise the fact I’ve been crying…again. A common occurrence when I think about my mother.

“Elena, don’t lie to me. Open this door immediately, or I’ll kick it in.”

I try to chuckle,

“Don’t be so dramatic, Ryan.”

The heavy thump of a boot against the door causes me to jump. I scramble to open it before it comes flying off its hinges.

“Are you insane?” I fling the door open and shout at the man standing on the other side.

“You’re crying. I’d kick down several doors to get to you if I have to.”

“I’m not crying.” I try to shrug off his insistence that something is wrong with me, but Ryan grabs my face, hard but not bruising, and examines it.

“I can see tears. No more lies, Elena. What’s wrong?”

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