Page 83 of Until I Have You

“I knew she was tired,” I say with a wry smile.

Bonnie insisted she could make it through a third movie.

Abigail wraps her arm around Bonnie and brushes her arm.“Oh, she’sout.”

I could watch them together all day, just like this.Not moving a muscle, fitting together like a puzzle.“She’s so comfortable with you.”

“I’m glad she is,” Abigail replies.“I didn’t know I needed her.”

My heart flutters.“How do you mean?”

“Just…” Abigail sighs.“I was letting life get the best of me before you two moved to New York.Focused on all the wrong things.Seeing the way she takes in the world is enlightening.We all need to see a bit more of the beauty.”

I nod and rest my arm on the back of the couch.Not quite behind Abigail.But if I inch closer bit by bit… “Having a child does that.And Bonnie is very good at seeing the beauty.”

Abigail tears her eyes from Bonnie to look at me.“You are a great dad, Theo.”

The fluttering in my chest halts.It’s replaced by a tightness.“Oh.You think?”

Abigail nods.“Absolutely.And I mean, she just adores you.”

I blush.“I’m glad to hear you think so.”

“There’s no thinking about it,” Abigail whispers in return.

I move closer, my arm shifting behind her.I let my fingers brush her hair.“You know, you’re very good with her too.”

Abigail’s face brightens.

“When you…” I pause and gulp.“When you have your own, you’ll be a wonderful mother.”

I’ve hurt my own feelings with that one.Picturing her as a mother to another man’s childrenkills me.

Her smile falls.“Good practice, I suppose.”

It doesn’t have to be practice.This could be the real thing.

I don’t have the strength to say that, but I do allow myself to brush the back of my hand against Abigail’s cheek.

Her eyes flutter shut.“I’m going to miss you.”

“Oh, Abigail…”

I should be self-deprecating.Tell her I’m not all that much to miss.

Instead, I reply, “You have no idea how I’ll miss you.”

For so many reasons.

She leans her head down onto my arm, nuzzling me.

I shift even closer until her head is up against my chest, Bonnie squeezed between us.

Abigail gives in, lets me hold her as she falls asleep too.

I kiss the crown of her head.

For a single moment, I allow myself to believe this is my life.That Abigail is mine.And Bonnie is ours.And we go through life together.

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