Page 86 of Until I Find You

The last time I was in a hospital room meeting a sibling was when Abigail was born. And I was still just a kid. Under ten. My memories from that day are fleeting. It was daytime, certainly. Dad brought me and Nate together. I think he buttered us up ahead of time with ice cream and presents so by the time we met Abigail, we wouldn’t feel jealous.

I go to Sonia’s bedside and touch her shoulder. “Congratulations.”

Sonia smiles up at me, her eyes still clouded with tears. “This is Emma.”

She looks like an Emma if you can say that about a newborn who is still all scrunched and red-faced. It’s sweet, though. Beyond sweet. Beautiful.

“She’s perfect.”

“She is,” Sonia says, her attention glued to the baby. She touches Emma’s little nose. Tugs at my heartstrings a bit.

“How are you feeling?” I ask.

“Amazing.”

Nate pipes up from his place against the wide windows. “I think the drugs are still wearing off.”

Sonia rolls her eyes. “Oh, be quiet.”

I chuckle and exchange look with my brother. “No Abigail yet.”

“She’s on her way. Bridget had to call her five times to get a hold of her. Working on something for grad school. So, I got here first. I win best big brother award.”

“I didn’t know it was a competition,” I say, then let my eyes fall to the corner of the room where Dad is posted up in a comfy looking chair, if you can call a hospital chair comfy. He’s got a bundle matching Sonia’s tucked up against his chest, this one with a blue hat. He looks to be submerged in a peace I’ve never known him to experience. So different from pictures I’ve seen from my own birth.

In the one photo taken of my father and me at the hospital, I’m cradled down by his chest, and he’s looking at me like I’m an alien.

I guess I can’t blame him. If I had had children in my early twenties, I would probably have been questioning everything in my life.

I force myself to smile. “Didn’t see you there, Dad.”

He smiles back, something like nostalgia in his eyes. “Hey, Jack.”

I leave Sonia’s side and go to my father, shoving my hands in my pockets since I don’t know what to do with them.

“Come sit,” Dad says, with a nod to the arm of the chair.

I perch beside him and duck my head down to get a better look at the baby. He’s got his little hand tucked up against the bare skin of Dad’s throat. “And this is?”

“Liam,” Dad says.

“Hi, Liam,” I say in a soft manner. “I’m Jack.”

Dad’s eyes are on me. I can feel them but won’t dare make eye contact. It might kill me, send forth the tears I’ve been damming up since walking into the room.

“Thank you for coming.”

“Of course, I came,” I say. “Why wouldn’t I?”

Dad hesitates. “I don’t know. But it means a lot you’re here.”

“Anything for Sonia,” I say with a glance back at her. She’s gorging on her sushi while Nate attends to little Emma beside her.

“Yeah, she’s amazing, isn’t she?” Dad says with his eyes fixed on her.

I don’t know what to say to that.

“I feel very lucky.”

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