Page 29 of Until I Find You

“Oh, aloha, Camilla. I am so happy to meet you, sweet girl,” she exclaims in my ear before kissing my cheek. When she draws away, she keeps her hands on my shoulders. “Let me look at you.” She takes me in, up and down.

I give Jack a sidelong glance. He closes his eyes to roll them without being seen, the soft skin of his eyelids bristling slightly.

“You’re very beautiful,” his mother says.

“Thank you. You are too.” Awkward. So awkward. Been a while since I’ve met the parents.

I thought the nerves wouldn’t be nearly as bad considering this isn’t an actual relationship. It doesn’t actually matter if they like me. However, Jack’s my boss, my partner, and I need to get this right. For the sake of the coffee.

She lifts her chin with a scoff. “Oh, please. Anyway, I’m Mari. This is my husband Geoff and–” She turns and realizes her family is not in her immediate wake. “Well, don’t just stand there!” she cries out and waves them toward us.

Jack clears his throat. “Hi, Mama.”

Mari’s attention snaps toward Jack. “Keiki.”

Her face brightens just a watt more, but I see it. She loves him. Adores him even.

So, why is she so distant?

Instead of releasing me, she takes one arm and wraps it around Jack so that we are both engulfed in her embrace. My side smushes up against Jack’s, closer than we had prepared to be with our sweaty hand-holding.

“I’m so happy you’ve come to visit,” Mari says, rubbing our backs.

“It’s a work trip,” Jack grunts.

Of course, he feels a need to clarify. But is he saying that to keep Mari at a distance just as she keeps him or to remind me?

I don’t care. What I need to do is focus on keeping my head down, playing the happy new girlfriend in the light of day and everywhere else, all business all the time.

Still, though, given my own search for my mother, a part of me wants to scream at them, “Don’t you know how different it could be? Don’t you know how lucky you are?”

Mari raises one of her shoulders. Her joy is palpable. “I know, I know, but a work trip with benefits, obviously.”

And I can’t decide if I want to laugh or cry. Because we will have none of the ‘benefits’ part.

Mari introduces us to Jack’s half siblings, Kelly and Winston, both in their gangly teen years. Jack gives them awkward hugs, followed by a handshake with Geoff.

I remain as pleasant and cordial as possible but try to keep some distance. This is just for show, so there is no need for anyone, including me, to get any ideas or get too attached.

We waft over to baggage claim and continue the conversation, waiting for the carousel to bring us our bags.

“So, work trip. For both of you?” Mari quirks an eyebrow.

“Well, uh–” Jack does a double take toward me.

I only smile back at him. I have no idea what to say here either. There is too much going on right now and I wish I was home tucked into my bed. This was his idea, so I will play along but I will remain as silent as I can about whatever we are supposed to be.

“Yes. Best of both worlds in this case.” Jack slides his arm around my shoulder, tucking me against him.

In order not to look uncomfortable, I lift my hand to his chest.

His heart isthumping.Hard. Probably from the nerves.

Unthinking, I caress his chest. It doesn’t even cross my mind that it will help sell the whole couple thing. But now that I think about it, that’s what I’ll tell myself I’m doing in order to avoid thinking about how nice it feels to be pressed up against him.

It’s been years since I’ve been in a relationship. My body is in need of a bit of physical contact. My needs haven’t been met in so long. I need human touch. That’s all this is.

“And I’ve been needing a change of scenery, right, Cami?”

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