Page 16 of Until I Find You

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CAMILLA

I can’t believeI did that. Turned my back on the highest payout of my career.

I could have just sucked it up and gone to Hawaii on my own. Kept my head down, put my nose to the grindstone. I’m used to that.

Except the way Seth sold me the idea of working with Jack, the idea that this would be a step up, I couldn’t help but feel the tension building between Jack and me.

The problem is that that tension was too overwhelming. There was no way I could handle it. And it’s not like Jack isn’t attractive because oh, my lord, he is!

Every day I walked into the penthouse, I was determinednotto think that and then he’d show up to the door in a crisp dress shirt and a pair of sensible pants andloafers. I mean, who wears loafers in their own home?

I guess he was really trying to get it right. And I almost feel bad for him.

Almost.

I hit my breaking point today not only because of his acting like…like an ogre, but because by noon, he’d rolled his sleeves up to his elbows andgod, the man has great forearms.

I was running a fever, and it was ready to spike.

Too bad it came out the way it did.

I haven’t gotten the confidence to reach out to Seth yet. I have a feeling he’d take me right back, but I’m not sure I could face his disappointment.

“Cami? Honey?”

I snap back to attention, staring into the screen of my phone. My parents are scrunched together at the kitchen table of my childhood home, staring at me.

“You okay?” Mom asks, her frown mixing with the ever-present wrinkles on her forehead.

“Yeah, sorry, sorry, I was just thinking about…work stuff.”

My mom and dad look at each other, lips thinned out. I know that look. That’s the look they’ve been giving each other since I moved to New York for undergrad.

“Cami, we’re worried about you,” Dad says.

It’s always the same. If it’s not one thing, it’s another. Worried about my safety, my tendency toward overworking myself, my lack of iron.

“Dad, I’m fine.” But I’m so not. This is one of the few times I’m reallynotfine. However, they don’t need to know that.

“Why don’t you come home for a visit?” he asks, giving me a bright smile.

“Or! Come home and stay! For…forever!” Mom adds with a similar grin.

“Mom…”

“Oh, come on, honey, all your siblings are here! And we’re here! You move in with us, take some time to find a job. You could actually date!”

My father runs his hand over his mostly bald head. “Now, Lisa, that’s a bit–”

“I’m just saying! You know, men out here are interested in settling down faster than men out there. Why work if you don’t have to?”

I love my parents. I really love them. I had a great childhood because they adopted me. However, I want to make my own way.

I want to know who I am when I’m just me, not the me I have to be around them.

They were already forty by the time they adopted me. All my siblings were ten and older. I love them, but we were never as close as we could have been if I were really their blood.

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