Page 103 of Until I Find You

I know I’m not being fair. It’s her burden to literally bear, and the idea of that must be scary.

But she has me. Surely that helps, right? I’m her partner. Herpartner. In all ways. And behind closed doors, I’ve made it clear every moment that I am dedicated to taking care of her.

It’s not that simple.

And yet, it is.

There’s a lull in the conversation. I should be the one to pick it up, but I can’t.

Camilla does. “Okay, I think I’ve got enough on the hibiscus. Maybe we should move onto the pastries?”

I press my lips together to keep my expression from curdling.

How can she be so peppy, act like the realization she had in the bathroom wasn’t a huge bomb on everything?

She looks at me. Nods at me like I’m supposed to say something. “Sound good, Jack?”

I bite on the insides of my cheeks.

I’m a businessman. I used to run the floor at the Stock Exchange, act like I was an unfeeling robot, crunching numbers, working myself to the bone. I can make it through this. I can.

I have to.

I press a smile onto my face. “Wait until you guys try the lilikoi bars.”

“I thinkit’s just so cool, man.”

Nate is the last one to go, and he’s got me trapped in the front door of the café.

“Thanks,” I say with a tired smile.

“Seriously, I mean, you me, and Abs, we’re the same but we’re different, you know?”

I chuckle. “Yeah.”

“Like, we share Dad, but we all have our own heritage. And…I don’t think you’ve ever shared this much with us. Or I just didn’t ask,” Nate says.

My older brother spent most of his twenties in his old world of being a bad boy surfer. Hell, he spent three years no contact with Dad, which pulled him out of my orbit too. I don’t want to think about the accident he had, the one that almost left him without the use of his legs, but it changed something in him. Made him realize what’s important.

So, yeah, he never asked.

But we have time now. And Nate makes the best of using it.

“We’ll all have to go down to the farm some time,” he says.

“That would be cool,” I say. And I mean it. Yes, Hawaii means my mom. But it’s not just her place. It’s mine too.

Nate claps a hand on my shoulder, then glances back into the shop. “And I know it’s early, but you two are really good together.”

I look where he’s looking, holding my breath. Camilla is leaned against the counter, typing on her phone.

“Maybe it’s just the working rapport or something, but just…when you know, you know. Don’t question it if you feel it.”

I hadn’t questioned that knowing until sitting on the bathroom floor. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

Nate gives me a hearty pat, says a final goodbye, then heads out the door.

I close it behind him, lock the door, and keep my hand there for a long moment.

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