Page 39 of Dump and Chase

“Lots of kids for some reason. You’d think they’d come before school starts.”

Before she picked up a knife to start chopping, I walked over to her and took her hands. I led her over to the dining room table. Maybe the expression on my face was giving something away because her forehead wrinkled.

“Is everything all right?” she asked.

“I hope so,” I said, trying to smile.

“But you’re acting weird.”

I tapped a finger on the table. Where did I begin? Did I tell her the whole story or just rip off the Band-Aid? No, I owed her the whole story.

“I know. I’ve been off for a few weeks. A lot has been going on.”

“Is this about your dad? Are you depressed? It’s normal to get depressed after the loss of a parent. It can also be a very stressful time.”

I patted her hand. Fuck, this was going to be hard. “Sort of. When I went back home, a lot was going on. Losing Dad was hard, and it brought up a lot of feelings. Anyway, I’m not going to draw this out and keep you wondering.” I swallowed the lump in my throat. It felt like a golf ball with studs. “You know I hadn’t seen a lot of friends and family for a while, so there was a lot of reminiscing at the funeral. Tangi and I caught up too. I hadn’t seen in her three years, so it felt like the right thing to do. Get closure.”

Brandi’s blue eyes were searching my face. “Okay. Why do I not like the sound of things?”

“She and I talked and it got emotional. Brandi, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to, but we slept together.”

Her eyes bulged and her hands flew to her face. I didn’t know if she was even breathing. Finally she took a halting breath. “Why? Why would you do that?”

I tried to reach out for her, but she slapped my hand away, so I gave her space. “I didn’t intend for it to happen. We were talking about Dad and the past, and our lives, and I don’t even know who made the first move. I regretted it right away. It was a huge mistake.”

She was shaking her head now. “Iknewit. I knew something happened, but I wasn’t sure. I told myself you’d never do that to me. I thought you were a good one.”

“I got caught up in the moment of grief. I wouldn’t have done it if I’d been thinking clearly.”

She got up and started pacing the dining room. “I’m not sure how I’m supposed to deal with this,” she said, wiping at the tears that started to fall. “This is so humiliating. If people found out … No, no one has to find out.” She turned to me now, pointing. “You will tell her to tell no one. Maybe we can draft an NDA, get her to sign it, and that way she can’t tell anyone. Yes, that’s what we’ll do. I’m not saying I forgive you, but it’s a start.”

Damn.

“Brandi, listen, I—”

“No,” she shrieked. “Don’t even try to tell me that I have to be nice about this. She is not going to ruin my life. You two made a mistake, but I’m not giving up our life together for one screwup. You promise me you will never do anything like that again, because I swear, if you humiliate me like that again, I’ll never forgive you.”

“You didn’t give me a—”

“I don’t want to hear it. If we just forget about this, make her shut up, it will be fine.”

“But you—”

“Don’t say another word! I don’t want to hear how sorry you are.”

I stood up and went to her, grabbing hold of her hands. “Just stop. Listen to me!” I said so loud she finally stopped interrupting me. More calmly, I said, “You need to let me finish. I know this is a shock and you’re upset right now, but there is more I need to tell you.”

Brandi’s eyes searched my face. “You’re leaving me for her.”

“No,” I said. “I don’t want to hurt you more than you’re already hurt, but I need to tell you this. Tangi’s pregnant. The baby is mine.”

Tears sprang to her eyes, and I felt like the garage human being that I was.

“No, no, no,” she kept repeating.

“We should have been more careful.Ishould have been careful. I didn’t expect this to happen, and I’ll do anything I need to in order to make it up to you.”

“And she’s having this baby?”