Page 67 of Unknown Royal Baby

The silence following his words made Avril feel empty inside. She knew what Isam’s schedule was like. He tried hard to carve out time for them every day. But to visit London? Such visits would be rare.

‘You wanted to be a hands-on father,’ she whispered, feeling her insides turn over in a sickening tumble of distress.

This time he didn’t flinch, just stared at the distant city streetlights. Was he thinking of the millions of people out there who looked up to him as their leader? ‘We can’t always have everything we want. I’ll have to try to make it up to her when she’s older.’

Avril put her hand to her mouth, stifling a cry of horror. That was one of the saddest things she’d ever heard. She knew how Isam loved their daughter. He positively revelled in being a father. For him family came first.

Was that why he was letting them go? Did he think Maryam would fare better if Avril was happy?

Isam was sacrificing his own bond with their daughter and it made Avril ashamed. She’d tried to make Maryam’s need to be with both parents a priority, but when it came to the crunch she hadn’t been able to go through with a loveless marriage.

Avril found herself circling the table, drawn to the pain radiating from the big man at the window. Hating that she was the cause. Wishing there were a better way for all of them.

Something crackled under her foot and she looked down to see the paper he’d been reading. Except he hadn’t been reading. There was no text on it. Instead it was a large photo. She scooped it up.

Her heart beat louder and something snagged high in her throat. It was one of the photos taken on the day their engagement was announced but she’d never seen it before. It certainly hadn’t been released to the public. It showed her and Isam sitting together with Maryam. Avril was smiling down at their daughter but Isam wasn’t. Nor was he looking at the camera. His head was turned to Avril, his expression unguarded.

She told herself the camera lied, that it was the angle or the light making it look like something it wasn’t.

Yet something leapt inside her. Something bright and hopeful. His expression as he looked at her was familiar. Not because she’d seen it before but because it was how she felt about him.

She trembled and the photo fell from her unsteady hands.

‘It’s late. Go to bed, Avril. We’ll talk when the sun’s up.’

Still he didn’t turn. Because he’d washed his hands of her? Was he already planning his future without her? She didn’t believe it.

Avril moved closer until she stood just behind him, near enough to inhale the comforting scent of citrus and warm man. ‘You’re not going to try to persuade me to stay?’

Suddenly he was facing her, his grim face just above hers. This close the pain in his eyes made her want to cry.

‘You said there’s no point and you wouldn’t lie about that. You’re not that cruel.’ Yet as he looked down at her his eyes widened. What did he see in her face? ‘Avril?’

Her heart pounded and she felt something like the mix of fearful exhilaration she’d experienced the first time she drove a four-wheel drive on a mountain road.

‘But maybe I was mistaken,’ she murmured. ‘I was so sure...’

Warmth enveloped her shaking hands. She looked down to see Isam holding them tight.

‘What were you sure about, sweetheart?’

Her heart dipped and soared. ‘That you only wanted me for Maryam’s sake. And to avoid scandal.’

Those long fingers tightened around hers. The blood beat through her body again and again as silence grew.

‘That’s what I thought, in the beginning.’

Avril’s gaze flew to his. Her mouth dried at what she saw there.

‘You must remember, I was raised expecting to contract a marriage of convenience. My family never married for love.’ As if anticipating her interruption he shook his head. ‘My grandparents were the sole exception to that and I know my grandmother missed my grandfather every day after his early death. If anything, that warned me off the idea of romance.’

He breathed deep, his chest rising. ‘But that’s not how I feel now. Now I understand exactly how my grandmother felt. These last months have been—’

‘Wonderful,’ Avril murmured, hardly daring to hope. ‘More wonderful than I could have imagined.’

Isam’s hands firmed around hers. ‘But then that changed.’

She nodded. ‘I told myself I could marry you and be happy for Maryam’s sake. But every time we drew closer, something would happen to remind me our relationship is all about duty.’

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