Page 77 of The Last Days of Lilah Goodluck

“Is it?”

He licks his lips and sighs. “You know I enjoy your company, Leannan. Where are you going with this?”

“Kind of wondering if you’re going to turn tail and run.”

“That’s not going to happen.”

“Guess we’ll see,” I say. “How often do people try to use you in the hope of getting close to your father or some such bullshit?”

“Often enough.”

“Protecting yourself makes sense. Controlling your little corner of the world. It’s just self-preservation.”

“I’ll ask again, where are you going with this?”

“Just thinking out loud,” I say. “Your anxieties and my insecurities are bound to keep things interesting between us, that’s for sure. But back to the topic of your previous relationships. So, you’ve actually dated people for months or even years at a time while maintaining these strict boundaries?”

He huffs out a “Yes.”

“No hanging out at your house and no meeting your friends for the first month?”

A stiff nod is the only response.

“They have their lives, and you have yours. It all sounds very... What’s the word I’m looking for?”

He offers nothing.

“Neat. Contained.Cautious.” I cover the short distance between us. The polish on his plain black oxford business shoes is flawless. His hands are stuffed in his pants pockets, and his face is back to the careful blank. His default setting. He hides from the world behind that handsome face. You might think he feels nothing at all. The only tell is the thin line of his lips. And the sight of it fucking thrills me. “None of those things are really me. At least, not these days.”

He grunts.

“I kind of feel like you’ve been on at least part of that journey with me. But now I wonder if we’ve finally hit a wall now that I’ve made myself at home. Because you do not look comfortable.”

A muscle in his perfect jawline pops. “It’s not a problem.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to tell me you have work to do?”

“Lilah—”

“What’s going to happen when I really start stepping on your toes? That’s what I’m worrying about. And between you and me, it’s bound to happen sooner or later. What do you think?” I ask, getting all up in his face. “Should I just go ahead and do it and see what happens? Put us both out of our misery?”

The man is whip-fast when he moves. Hands fist in my hair and his mouth slams down on mine. This is absolutely what I want. No holding back. I’ve finally shredded his control, and it’s a beautiful thing. His tongue in my mouth as he kisses me senseless. My fingers fumbling over the buttons of his shirt. There’s no teasing in him now. No clever talk or power play. The hem of my shirt is ripped out of the waistband of my pants. Then he tears the two sides of my top apart caveman style, buttons spilling across the floor.

His own shirt is given similar rough treatment. Just wrenched off over his head. How I love touching him, feeling the heat of his smooth skin. My palms travel up and over his thick shoulders. I am an endorphin-soaked mess. And all the while, he’s moving us in the direction of the bed. He toes off his shoes, tears off his socks, and dismisses his pants in short fashion.Holy shit.The sight of him in nothing but a pair of black boxer briefs is sublime. And I am not above staring at the outline of his cock. While I’m lost in wonder, he’s dealing with my pants, and we’re both in our underwear in no time. He’s already seen me in lingerie. Though the way he stops to appreciate the sight is sweet. He slowly trails his fingers over the lace edging of my bra. He caresses the curve of my stomach and the thickness of my thighs. I couldn’t be more seduced by the man.

“On the bed,” he says, his voice rough.

There’s something hypnotizing about his dark eyes. His pupils are dilated and his focus on me complete. I do as I’m asked and he follows, looming over me like a predator. My back hits the mattress and he hooks a finger on either side of my nice new panties. Going, going, gone. I don’t recall anyone stopping and staring at my sex in this manner. But Alistair plays by his own rules. His cheekbones stand out in stark relief, and the hunger in his eyes is...Shit.I don’t know. My mind is mush.

Oral is often hit-and-miss for me. Josh had an attention span of less than a minute. And that’s being generous. The one before him would only go down on special occasions. You can imagine how upset I was when we broke up mere days before my birthday. The sad truth is, in my experience, a sex toy is generally more reliable than a man. I hate to be harsh, but—

Teeth deliver a sting to my mound. Alistair bites me just hard enough to ensure he has my full fucking attention. There is no easing into things. No slow getting to know you and your private parts. He licks and sucks and bites as he pleases. With an arm wrapped around each thigh, he holds my legs wide open. He suckles on my labia and nibbles on my inner thigh. His breath warms me as he runs his tongue back and forth along my seam. No part of me is neglected. From drawing circles around my clit with the tip of his tongue to teasing my back entrance. I swear, when he groans, it goes right through me. Same with his snarl. The noises he makes light me up from inside.

Each move he makes amps me higher and higher. So much pressure low in my body, gathering at the base of my spine. When he settles in to suck on my clit, it’s all over. The orgasm crashes into me like a supernova. I am darkness and stardust, scattered throughout space and time. At least, that’s what it feels like when he blows my damn mind.

While I catch my breath, he wipes off his mouth, retrieves a condom from the bedside drawer, and loses the boxer briefs. His dick is sizable. A little longer than average length and a bit thicker too. On goes the protection as his gaze wanders over the flush that’s coloring my neck and chest.

“I like that shade,” he says. “Why is your bra still on?”

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