Page 28 of Forbidden Until Midnight

She nodded and, leaving the glass of whisky he had offered her untouched, stood.

Her head swam a little and she wanted air. Fresh air. She needed to think. She couldn’t afford to be so selfish. She couldn’t afford to behave like a child. She couldn’t afford to keep hurting the people around her: her mother, her brother...Santo.

Raising a shaking hand to her lips, she knew that no matter who she kissed, or how many people, none would stand up to what she had felt with Santo.

‘I—’

‘You should leave. Now,’ he commanded, deliberately turning his back to her, and she knew that it was the end of the discussion. It hurt, but she’d done it to herself and it was time that she owned that.

But as she left the room she could only wish that her selfishness hadn’t cost herhim.

CHAPTER SEVEN

New Year’s Eve three years ago, Barcelona

ELEANORLOOKEDOUTbeyond the bustling lights glowing from the Port of Barcelona, even on this night, to the dark blank space of the Balearic Sea, wondering if she could count the ways that her life had changed again.

Santo wouldn’t know it, but what had passed between them last year had altered her fundamentally. In rare moments she thought that he might have said what he did because she’d hurt him. But then she came to her senses, refusing to overestimate her importance to him. Whatever had caused them, his words had been blunt and forceful to the point of bruising, but she had desperately needed to hear them.

And from the moment that she’d returned home she’d known that she needed to make serious changes in both her behaviour and her mindset. Shame and embarrassment at how selfish she had been were only useful if they drove her to do better. So that was what she’d made them do. Drive her forward.

At home, when Freddie was back from boarding school she had spent as much time with him as she could. She had soaked in all that he was, hoping that he would some day realise how much she loved him, and how much she’d tried to protect him from Edward—who was unable to separate them without making an unnecessary scene.

And with her mother, Eleanor had tried her hardest to make peace with what little relationship they had under Edward’s watchful eye. Although it seemed paranoid, she couldn’t help but feel that the staff had been instructed to report back any conversations she shared with her mother, and the newly increased number of them meant that there was very little time for them to be alone.

She’d reached out to her university professor and had arranged to repeat the last year through remote learning. She’d been able to take out a personal loan to cover the tuition fees, whilst also securing a job at Mads Rassmussen’s London office.

Edward hadn’t liked that one little bit, but she’d sold it to him that it would enable her to keep an ear to the ground about the financial goings-on of one of the families. She doubted that Edward believed a word she’d said, but he’d surprisingly let it go.

But between the full-time job, her studies and trying to keep a fragile peace at home, Eleanor was feeling the strain. Strain that she pushed down hard. Other people had been through worse. She’d had twenty years of privileged pampering. She would certainly survive the next few years. All she had to do was wait until Freddie was eighteen, and the three of them could leave. Until then, Eleanor would do everything she could to ensure that they had somewhere to go and some money to take with them. They didn’t even need that much. Just enough. Enoughneverto be dependent on someone else ever again.

‘Ah, here she is, my latest employee,’ announced Mads with Ekaterina on his arm.

Eleanor smiled warmly at the couple. While she worked hard to keep her guard up around them, about what she said of herself and her family, she liked them. And God knew, she would have been nowhere without Mads taking a risk on a woman with no work history, no experience and no degree to her name.

‘How is it, working for Mads? Is he a mean boss?’ Kat asked, poking her fiancé teasingly.

‘Terrible,’ Eleanor replied with mock horror. ‘He even makes me work on Fridays,’ she replied.

‘You can’t make her do that.’ Kat turned to him, outraged.

‘My love,mostpeople who are employed have to work on Fridays,’ he chided.

A part of Eleanor was amazed at how clueless Ekaterina was, but the other part was sympathetic. Just remembering the sheer basic day-to-day things that she hadn’t known when she’d first started work filled Eleanor with deep embarrassment.

It had been hard to win over her fellow staff members, all of whom—understandably—thought she was only ‘playing’ at having a job. The first few months as a personal assistant had been truly awful for her. But every day she went back, every time she worked a little longer, a little harder, she won another inch of their respect. Eventually she’d picked up the basic skills that she lacked and was able to add that to the foundation from her university degree and she had finally found her feet.

Eleanor gritted her teeth as Dilly passed by, her slow head-to-toe perusal making it clear that her one-time friend had recognised the dress that Eleanor had worn before at a previous event. The mean tittering from Dilly and another girl told her that it wouldn’t be long before whatever rumour the other woman had spun it into would be around the room in no time.

Well, let them. Eleanor no longer had the luxury of wasting money on brand-new gowns. And while the income she had saved that year was almost embarrassingly low, in some ways it was more than she could ever have imagined. It washers. She’d earnt it. Herself. It hadn’t been given to her and couldn’t be taken away. And that made her feel like it was millions.

‘Well, Thompson has been saying how good you’ve been getting on in the last few months, so keep it up!’ Mads said, with a little fist pump that made her smile.

When she’d first approached him she knew that he had been both suspicious and surprised. She’d told him only as much as she’d dared. He’d taken such a chance on her, and she’d never forget it.

‘Uh-oh,’ Kat said, leaning in to whisper. ‘Grumpy is here. And it seems he’s not alone,’ she added.

Eleanor frowned and turned to see who had just entered the room.

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