Page 51 of Princess Bride Swap

Beau didn’t rest. Because she felt the wreckage of everything like a sharp weight against her lungs.

He would never look at her the same. He would hide her away.

You do not need to attend the parliamentary dinner if you do not wish.

He did not need to be any clearer. He was embarrassed by her now. She’d ruined everything. All the years of refusing to believe what her parents thought of her, but now...

Maybe they were right. She was weak. And Lyon needed strength, stability, respectability. That could never be her.

What is it you think I’ll do?

He’d sounded so horrified. So affronted.

Lock me away. Hate me.

She wouldn’t stand for it. Not again. Maybe she loved him. Maybe it broke her heart into a million pieces, but she would not be locked away. And if she told herself it wasthat, and not that the worst thing she could imagine was having to live with him knowing he viewed her as what she was:less, then maybe she could get through this.

Because there were always options. She could fall apart. She could let this break her into all the pieces she stitched together after each and every panic attack. Or she could refuse to be ended no matter how much her heart hurt.

She hadn’t been herself for weeks now. So maybe this was an opportunity. To get back to the person she’d been before she’d been stupid enough to soften her heart to someone who expected perfection.

ThatBeau had been strong, determined, sure of herself. Maybe there’d been a decided lack of joy, a loneliness, particularly after Zia had run away and she’d been left alone with her parents, but she hadn’t felt destroyed.

Nothing was worse than this feeling. It would choke her until there was nothing left. She had to...get out.

She grabbed her phone, called Zia. “Zia. I know you’re busy, and the babies must come first, but...”

“Beau, what is it?”

“I need help. I need...to run away.” It was the only answer. She wouldn’t be locked away. She wouldn’t be hidden. She wouldn’t keep living this...strange, gray version of turning into her mother.

She wouldn’t stay and make Lyon unhappy. He would be angry about that, because it didn’t look good from the outside, but she was tired of the damn outside. He could make up a lie. The version of her that was his wife could be a story people told, just like the story of her as a princess had always been.

She existed. She wasn’t seen. Only instead of hiding in his castle, she would be free. She would befree.

Zia had run away and all had worked out, so this would too.

“What’s happened? Did he hurt you? I’ll kill him. Well, no, I’ll send Cristhian to kill him. That’s far scarier.”

She wanted to be warmed by the viciousness in Zia’s voice, but she didn’t feel the least bit bloodthirsty. She wasn’tangryat Lyon. She was just...devastated. “No, no. It isn’t that.”

“Then what is it?”

“Lyon...discovered my panic attacks.”

There was a beat of silence. “Did you think you could hide it forever?” Zia asked gently.

The truth was, Beau had thought exactly that. Or maybe held on to the hope she was in control of some facet of her life and that she would be able to.

All up in smoke now.

“No, I suppose not, but... I can’t be what Lyon needs me to be now. He knows I’m defective, and he’ll hide me away.”

“Did he call you that?” Zia demanded. “Iamgoing to kill him. With my bare hands.”

Beau thought back. No, he hadn’t said anything like her father would have, but she’d seen it in his face. In the way he’d pulled back. He saw her differently now. Maybe there was enough kindness in him not to say it to her face, but she was broken now in his eyes.

She would not make him happy now that he knew this. She could not be the partner he needed, expected. “Not in so many words, no. He has a kindness to him. This isn’t about...cruelty. I just can’t be someone’s dirty little secret again, hidden away. I won’t be.”

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