Page 47 of Teasing a King

“I already love the little bean,” I say. “Boy or girl makes no difference to me.”

Van pulls into the parking lot of the doctor’s office, parking close to the front entrance. “So, you don’t want to find out the sex?” he asks.

“Do you?” I counter.

He shrugs. “I want what you want.”

I narrow my eyes at him. “You’re not angling for a gender reveal party, are you?”

Van looks so horrified that I laugh.

“Hell no!” he says loudly. He studies me for a second, his blue eyes uncertain. “Unless that’s what you want?”

I shake my head. “Definitely not. That’s not my style.”

He gives a theatrical shudder. “Good,” he says. “Back to the subject at hand. Do you want to find out the baby’s sex?”

I think about it for a few seconds before shaking my head. “I don’t,” I say. “Is that okay?”

Van smiles, making my heart trip in my chest. I wonder if he knows how much that smile affects me.

“Like I said,” he murmurs, leaning over for a kiss. “I want what you want.” He brushes his lips across mine lightly in a quick kiss. “A healthy, happy baby. Nothing else matters.”

I smile and grab his shirt to pull him back to me for a more thorough kiss. “Good answer,” I say when we break apart.

“Keep that up and I’ll drive us back home right now,” Van whispers, leaning toward me again.

“Save it for later,” I say, reaching for my door.

“Tease,” I hear him mutter, making me laugh as I climb from the car.

Van laces his fingers through mine as we walk inside. This is the second OB appointment I’ve had since moving to Oak Hill. It’s also the second one Van has tagged along for. I’d tried insisting he didn’t have to come with me for these checkups, but he’d been adamant that he was going to be a supportive partner. When we’d heard the baby’s heartbeat for the first time, I’d been so happy he was there with me. The look of wonder on his face had been priceless. Today is a much bigger milestone, though. It’s ultrasound day.

Van has been talking about it nonstop ever since Quinn and Ronan found out they’re having a boy just a couple of weeks ago. Ronan had been more animated than ever at dinner that weekend. The normally silent man had smiled and laughed and held up the little printed photo to anyone who would look at it. In the car on the way home, Van had been just as excited about the prospect of seeing our baby. When we’d gotten home, he’d taken me straight to bed. He’d worshipped my body with his hands and mouth until I’d practically begged him to take me.

Despite what I’d said earlier to Van, I am a little nervous. I can’t help but worry about all the possibilities. I know it’s most likely that our baby is healthy and perfect, but the what ifs keep popping up in my mind. I’ve done my best to banish those worries, but they linger at the edges of my thoughts. I don’t know enough about my family’s medical history to know if there’s something I should be worried about. So, I’d let the internet terrify me with all the possible congenital abnormalities a baby could have until I’d been in a complete panic. Even after I convinced myself that those were all long shots, I can’t help but wonder and worry. I won’t feel relief until I can see for myself that the baby is fine.

Van squeezes my hand as we wait, and I look over at him. His excitement is written on his face. I can’t help but feel a trickle of excitement myself. Some of the worry in me ebbs and I know it’s because of him. I try to imagine sitting here alone, waiting to go back. Not having anyone to share the worry and excitement with. I know there are plenty of women who go through pregnancy alone. My mother was one of them. Maybe it’s why she didn’t want me, in the end. How much harder would it be to do this alone, I wonder.

I hear my name called and Van’s fingers tighten on mine, reminding me that I don’t have to do this alone. I have him by my side. I squeeze his hand lightly, give him a smile and make my way over to the smiling woman in scrubs. She introduces herself as Stacy and leads the two of us to a darkened room. I lie back on the lightly cushioned table and expose my slightly rounded belly. Van looks confused about where he should stand until Stacy smiles and gestures to a spot up near my head. It moves him out of Stacy’s way for the scan, but it also means I can’t see him. For some reason, this bothers me more than it should. Without thinking, I slide my hand up near my head and Van immediately takes it in both of his. The tech is chattering on about the weather while she gets her machine ready, but I don’t really hear her. I’m completely focused on the feel of Van’s strong hands holding mine, grounding me in this moment.

“Okay,” Stacy says brightly. “Ready to get started?”

I nod and she smiles back. She tucks a paper towel in the waistband of my pants and another one under my shirt.

“Don’t want to get any gel on your clothes,” she explains. I nod again as if I understand what she’s talking about. She holds up a white, plastic bottle and squirts a glob of warm gel on my belly.

“Let’s see your baby,” she says with another excited smile.

My heart is pounding, and I squeeze Van’s hand again. Stacy puts the ultrasound probe to my belly and the black screen on the monitor starts to move with random shapes in shades of gray and white. I watch the screen, trying to make sense of the images, but it’s all just random blobs to my untrained eyes. I glance from the screen to Stacy’s face, trying to see if she looks alarmed or worried, but she’s wearing that same serene smile she’s worn since she called my name in the lobby. Her eyes narrow in concentration as she works. At least, I hope it’s concentration and not worry. As I watch, Stacy’s eyes relax, and her smile widens.

“There,” she says. “Little bugger was hiding from us.”

I follow her gaze to the screen, trying to make sense of the image. Stacy clicks a button and the image freezes. She points.

“There’s the head,” she says. “And an arm. The legs, all curled up. See?”

It takes me a second, but then I do see. I can see all the things she’s pointing out to me. My baby. It’s right there on the screen in front of me. My breath catches in my throat. Van’s fingers tighten on mine, and I look up at him. He’s staring at the screen in wonder, his eyes suspiciously bright.

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