Page 49 of Edging Obsession

“I guess not.” My face scrunches like a balled-up piece of paper. “I’m going to check on Miles.”

Johann shrugs. “You might not want to disturb his beast.”

I give his arm a little squeeze. “I’ll take my chances.”

With that, he leaves, and I enter the gym. Miles’ hits and grunts echo through the warehouse style building. He hasn’t let up. I move over to where he is, press my back to the wall, and slide down onto my butt. My legs stretch out, crossing at the ankles, and I fold my hands in my lap. He gives me a sideways glance under the thickness of his lashes to hide the fact he saw me. I watch his knuckles tear apart while he punishes the punching bag. More like punishes himself. He’s drenched in sweat, heaving in breaths. Punch. Kick. Punch. Punch. Kick. This goes on for a little while longer until he loses his balance and stumbles backwards.

He rests his hands on his knees to catch his breath. I remain quiet and let him be. Then my dominant man surprises me. He drops to the floor next to me, resting his forearms on top of his bent legs. Sweat drips onto the wall and his shoulders. My head turns toward my glorious man who doesn’t know how to release his suffering other than to inflict pain.

In a low voice, I say, “Since meeting you, you’ve protected me. Saved me. Listened to my ramblings and took on the weight of my burdens. It’s my turn.” He shifts, resting his head against mine. “Let me carry you this time.”

He lays down, resting his head in my lap, and curls into a fetal position. My fingers comb through his wet hair, massaging his scalp, staring ahead at the punching bag. We’ve run the gamut of relationship rule breaking. The instant connection and my mental illness had us latching onto one another before we made the slow pleasantries of introductions. His secrets laid under the surface until they could no longer remain hidden. My powerful Miles lays in a heap next to me because secrets from his past exploded.

“Mein Lieber. Your Schatzi has no secrets. Her legs have no reason to run.” My gaze drops down to his exhausted form. “We’ve had our fights and made amends. Running away isn’t an option anymore.” I bend to kiss his cheek, and whisper, “Leave the past behind. It’s over.”

He wraps his arms around my legs, cuddling them, and releases silent tears.

We sit here for several hours. I shift from under him, causing him to sit up. Offering my hand once I’m standing, he takes it, and I lead him into the dressing room. Miles stands near the showers with his shoulders sagging while I turn the water on. His dazed eyes lock on mine while I remove his clothes, followed by mine. The connection breaks when I walk us under a showerhead. There are some shower gels in hanging baskets, so I suds him up, cleaning every inch of him. Fatigue lines his eyes. His body slumps forward.

Pressing his back to the wall, I kneel in front of him and work his cock. He was semi-hard, but it stiffens as soon as I’m kneeling. My tongue runs over the throbbing vein underneath his cock, then circles the head, wiggling inside the slit. I cup his balls, rolling them in my hand, using my saliva to soak his shaft, and then I take him into my mouth. I look up at him and my heart breaks. His head is plastered to the wall, tears flowing down his cheeks, gazing into space. Between my mouth and hand, I’m able to give him some form of release.

I stand to embrace him, and he gathers me in his arms, burying his face in my neck, and plants a soft kiss to it. My arm reaches behind him to shut off the water, but we remain this way, letting the garbage of the night wash down the drain.

24

Jules takes me to bed after I find out about my whore of a dead wife. I left my humiliation and burdens in the gym, only to wake in the middle of the night with anger. The sting of betrayal and abandonment has followed me my entire fucking life. I’m sick of it. This is why control burns through my veins. Control allows me to thrive. With my Schatzi, sex relieves us both of our constraints. When I’m focused on dominating her, controlling her pain and pleasure, everything burns away for that moment in time, and it rejuvenates me. Jules’ submission does the same for her. We were meant to be together.

Except learning of Karina’s infidelity has my anger rising. I leave Jules to find that sonofabitch, Uwe. At the shed, Hendrick has him handcuffed to the wall, half hanging. He lifts his head when he hears me and gives me a bloody smile. The smug bastard finds this amusing.

He lets out a gurgled laugh, and says, “Bist du hier, um mich aufzumischen? Vielleicht um mich zu töten?”(Are you here to rough me up? Maybe kill me?)

Even though my knuckles are split open from the punching bag, I slip on a pair of brass knuckles and approach him. I look at this piece of shit, mangily in appearance, wondering how she chose him over me. How could she pick this skinny asshole? Sex wasn’t nowhere near as great as it is with Jules, but we had our good times. Karina was never left unsatiated. Maybe he has a bigger dick. Or maybe he fed Karina’s narcissism when I retreated from her.

I can’t figure it out. She had money at her disposal. We partied at the clubs, fucked in public, I entertained her desires in group sex by letting her be with others. If it made her happy, I gave it to her, except the constant attention. Karina expected me to drop everything when she called. When in her presence, she expected my attention to be all on her. Once pregnant, she was worse, laying a guilt trip on me that I loved the baby more than her. Deep down, I did love the baby more. I couldn’t wait for her to have it, so I could give my undivided attention to my child.

Indulging Jules is different. Her medical condition adds to it, and as much as I hated Karina’s neediness, I twice as much love it with Jules. She calms my inner chaos. My micro-bursts when overwhelmed. I feel loved by her need for me.

Jules is my favorite song.

I tilt my head at Uwe. Unfortunately, all the dreams I had about the baby are now poisoned by the fact this asshole could be the father.

His taunting expression, the humor in his eyes, brings forth my inner demon. I pull my arm back, using all my might, and punch him in the face with the brass knuckles. This knocks him out. Hendrick retrieves a cold bucket, and I toss it on him to wake him up. I’m not done yet. Releasing his bindings, he falls to the ground, cursing and then laughing, rolling onto his side.

“Karina sagte, du wärst ein eiskalter Arsch.”(Karina said you were a cold prick.)He grabs his crotch. “Aber sie hat meinen großen Schwanz geliebt.”(But she loved my big cock.)

I grab his hair, hauling him up, and through gritted teeth say, “Ich schätze, was für den einen Müll ist, ist für den anderen ein Schatz. Du hast mir einen Gefallen getan.”(I guess one man’s trash is another’s treasure. You did me a favor.)

His mouth drops open and Hendrick hands me a wrench, which I shove in his mouth and proceed to pull his teeth out. The shed is soundproof, so no one can hear his screams. After he’s toothless, I clip off all his fingers using a cigar cutter. Every time he’s about to pass out, we use other measures to wake him. Now, I’m done. Taking Hendrick’s gun, I point it at Uwe’s head and shoot him between the eyes.

The shed has a washroom, so I take a quick shower and change clothes before returning home. Then I take another shower to rid myself of the scum. Plus, I don’t like bringing this part of the job home.

Jules is sitting up in bed rubbing her eyes. “Where did you go, Miles?”

I get into bed naked, kissing her neck, and working her out of her pajamas. “I couldn’t sleep, so I met up with Hendrick.”

She cuddles into my chest. “Are you feeling better?”

My mouth captures hers with a possessive, demanding kiss. Bruising. Jules moans into my mouth, while my cock jabs into her stomach. After I’ve expunged my emotions, and killed a man, I’m fucking horny and hungry for Jules. No matter how sexually intense I get, Jules doesn’t complain. Hard or soft, she melts and submits for me.

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