Page 18 of Breaking Storm

Sun shoots through the crack in the curtain. I’m on my stomach, so I roll to my back, rubbing my face with my hands. The only sign Joey slept here is his lingering scent. He and his smell sicken me. I stare up at the high ceiling, an off-white, highlighting the masculine colors. Even the room doesn’t reflect any part of me.

I snatch my phone from the bedside table and go into the bathroom to take a bath. While it fills, I sit on the tub’s ledge, bite my lip, and call Rosie. My eyes squeeze together, and I swallow to stop from crying. I’ve never cried this much in my life. Even after my father’s beatings, I refused to show him he got to me. To show weakness. But now… what does it matter? Maybe showing vulnerability will help stave off the inevitable—my stolen soul.

Rosie picks up on the third ring. “Teagan! Are you calling to tell me what I should wear tonight on my date?” I rub my eyebrows. The tears seep through my clenched eyes.

In order to talk, I inhale through my nose, clear my throat, and say, “Something sexy.” I wipe the tears from under my eyes. “Rosie…” My shaky hand presses against my mouth, chest, sliding over my thigh. She waits for me to continue. “Rosie, I’m calling to give my notice.”

She sucks in air and releases it with a sluggishwhy.

My palm presses against my heart. “Well, I didn’t tell you yesterday, but things are hectic in my life right now.” I cough for control. “Plus, I’d like to take a vacation over the summer.”

“Teaaagaaaan! Why didn’t you say something earlier? Is there something I can do to help?”

I mute the phone and cover my mouth as I let out a cry. It’s not fair. This wonderful woman is the only thing outside my fucked-up life that’s good. It takes a minute to regain my composure.

Unmuting the phone, I say, “Aw, Rosie. You’re great, you really are. This has nothing to do with you. I’m just going through a hard time right now. And I’m so, so sorry to quit. I love your shop.”

“Listen here, Sweetie. I’ll accept your resignation on one condition.”

I squeeze my nostrils together and snot leak out. “What condition?”

“The condition is that when things get better, and you’re okay to work again, you come straight to me.” This plunges me into a fit of sobs. “Honey, don’t cry. I want you to know my shop is always open to you as a customer, friend, and employee.”

Well, that didn’t help.

I shake my head. My voice is of splintered wood when I say, “Will do.” If I say anything else, I won’t be able to stop myself from crying.

“Good. Now, dry those eyes. I’m not upset, only concerned. I’m here for you, Teagan. If you ever want to talk, drop on by, and don’t be a stranger. Please call me anytime.”

“I will, Rosie. Thank you so much.”

The call ends and I toss my phone onto a step. Bubbles flip over the side of the tub when I ease into it. My neck rests on a cushion, closing my eyes and letting the tears flow. My eyes burn from so much crying. Tears have become a regular thing since I was told I was getting married. Outside, I hear the muffled sounds of a lawnmower, birds, and nearby laughter. Laughter. Someone robbed me of humor and sold it for anguish. What is my life worth now?

I got married a week ago today. The shards of that day and night still linger, along with abandonment. At night, I grip the covers tight, praying Joey doesn’t reach for me. And so far, my prayers have been answered. Joey is a shadow in this house. His silence has me famished for words and only crushes my hope for some semblance of normalcy. To not carry the burden of being forgotten.This home is a lonely construct of cement, metal, glass, and a man too hardened to care about a wife thrust upon him. Joey hasn’t touched me in a sexual or caring way. I’m not complaining. I’d rather he find solace in someone else’s embrace.

Since Joey has stripped me of everything, there’s nothing for me to do except wander the house or sit in the long, cramped backyard, enclosed by sky-high fences. It’s a sunny Sunday afternoon, so I go outside to sit by the pond in back. A couple of croaking frogs hop onto a rock in the pond.

I sit cross-legged on the bench. Goldfish swim around the rocks, their orange scales reflect the light. An exhausted sigh bursts from my lungs as I tip my head backwards to catch some sun on my face. A door closes from behind, a rustling of grass, and Sean is next to me. From the corner of my eye, I notice he has sandwiches and bottled water, but I remain the same as when he came out.

“Hey, Teagan.”

The best thing to do when you suffer from an irritation is to ignore it. Sean is an irritation and a traitor. He should protect me, not cause trouble by tattling.

“Truce?”

Opening my eyes to slits, he offers a sandwich to me, so I glance at him before taking it. He places the water bottles between us.

“Does this mean you forgive me?”

“Probably should.” I chew on the inside of my cheek. “Since you’re the closest thing to a friend that I have.” I let out a bitter laugh. “How sad?”

We eat our sandwiches in silence. There’s a large tree adjacent to us, hosting a variety of birds while the fish splash in the water. Every so often, a bird swoops downwards, skims across the water, grasping something in its mouth before flying away.

“Was this pond here when Joey moved in?”

“Huh?” I point to it. “Uh, I’m not sure. Why?”

“Just curious why there’s a pond here.”