Page 120 of Monster in Disguise

"Did I... did I do something wrong?" I ask, feeling a pang of unease. I stay on my knees, afraid that if I attempt to stand, my legs will give out beneath me.

"This isn't like you. You don't have to do this... Damn it." He mutters under his breath, reaching for a towel and wrapping it around his waist. Despite his obvious arousal, he seems agitated.

"But you enjoyed it before." My words spill out before I can stop them, desperate to keep him from leaving.

"What are you talking about?" He stops in his tracks, his eyes narrowing as he looks down at me. Suddenly, I feel exposed and vulnerable.

"It doesn't matter." I mumble, embarrassed that Cosima's words had planted seeds of doubt in my mind, leading me to believe that Marcello wanted this when he clearly didn't.

"No, tell me what you meant." He kneels down beside me.

"Cosima told me about your past," I confess hesitantly. "About the orgies. And I thought..."

"Orgies." He gives a dry laugh. "And what did you think?" He raises an eyebrow.

My head hangs low as I answer him, the weight of my shame dragging me down. "I can't fulfill that desire for you... but perhaps there are other ways I can please you." I try to explain, but he stops me.

"Lina, please look at me." His voice is gentle and coaxing, so I lift my gaze to meet his. "Whatever Cosima may have told you... there are always multiple sides to any truth. Yes, I have done things in the past that I am not proud of, but they are behind me now. It's been over a decade since I have been with anyone else. Does that sound like someone who craves orgies?"

I shake my head in response, but then another thought crosses my mind. "But... what if you were able to touch others? Would you have had those experiences?"

His answer is swift and resolute. "No."

"No?" I press, needing to be sure.

"No," he repeats firmly. "Because they were not the woman I loved." The words strike me with a force that nearly knocks me off balance, and I end up falling on my backside.

"The woman you loved," I echo hollowly. "Who was she?" My question spills out without hesitation, though my heart aches at the thought of him loving someone besides myself.

Do I even stand a chance against such love?

There is a deep sorrow in his eyes as he turns away from me. In an instant, he is standing and preparing to leave.

"Perhaps one day, I will tell you," he says softly before walking.

My mind is still reeling from the sudden revelation. Marcello was in love with someone else, maybe he still is. And I amalready in too deep; my feelings for him intensifying with each passing day.

As I rise to speak, I catch a glimpse of his retreating figure. Shock and horror surge through me at the sight. His once smooth skin is now marred by countless scars, crisscrossing his back in a chaotic pattern—some old and faded, others fresh and raw.

I gasp, my hand flying to my mouth in disbelief.

Good Lord! What happened to him?

It dawns on me then that in all our intimate moments, I have never seen his back. He had purposely kept it hidden from me.

But why?

Another realization hits me like a ton of bricks. I know next to nothing about my own husband, do I? The man I thought I knew has become a stranger before my eyes.

Marcello

With a heavy heart, I retreat to the safety of my room before I can do any further damage to my fragile relationship with Catalina. The air is thick with tension and my fists clench at my sides, ready to release the built-up frustration.

My fingers form a tight fist and I punch the wall, welcoming the sharp sensation of pain that briefly takes over my mind. It's a welcome distraction from the swirling thoughts that threaten to consume me.

But perhaps I deserve this pain. After all, what was Catalina thinking, trying to please me in such a way? Sweet, innocent Catalina, on her knees before me. How many times had I fantasized about just that? But seeing her there, struggling to choke down my cock out of some misguided sense of inadequacy...I couldn't let her continue.

And then she had to mention the orgies. A bitter laugh escapes my lips at the absurdity. Did she truly think I would be interested in those depravities? If only she knew...

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