Page 74 of Just a Number

I nod. It’s safe to say he’s taken my mind off my earlier fear. All I want to do is crawl into my bed, bury myself under the covers, and sleep. I don’t want the pain radiating in my chest or to spill the tears threatening to flood my eyes. I need to retreat.

“Lock the back door after me,” he calls as his footsteps carry him away from me. The back door closing with a click in the otherwise quiet house is more powerful than if he’d slammed it.

Chapter thirty

Alex

Iwake at midday. My head is pounding, and I want nothing more than to hide under the covers and sleep the rest of the day away. After checking Mel had locked up behind me, I came inside and collapsed on the sofa bed, still fully dressed, and stared up at the ceiling for what seemed like hours. The numbness I felt then was preferable to the pain radiating in my temples and my chest now.

That’s it. We’re done.

Last night, when I heard Mel scream, I was so worried. Helping her sort herself out after the power cut had kept me busy. And then she’d looked so lost at the thought of being left alone. Of course I couldn’t leave her.

Sitting on the floor with her, playing cards and talking had given me hope. Hope that she’d get past this block of being with a younger guy. That she’d let herself be happy. I mentally go over what we’d been talking about.Was it something specific I said that caused her to retreat again? Why is she so determined toset me free?Anger rises again.Why won’t she believe that she’s exactly what I want and I need and that we can figure out the rest as we go?

I sigh, puffing out a long breath, as I rise from the bed and make my way over to the kitchenette.

I long for a coffee from Mel’s fancy coffee machine, but it’ll need to be instant today. I need to keep my word and show her I’m serious, that I’m worthy of her love and affection, which means I need to find somewhere else to live. I need to stay away from her.Getting to the end of the day feels impossible right now, never mind a whole fucking year.

The coffee gives me a half-hearted kick-start and I grab up my phone to start looking online for room listings. I have a missed call from Brenda at the Arts Centre and a text from her:

Brenda:

Hi, Alex. Maggie has asked for your contact details. Please confirm I can give her them. Thanks, Brenda.

Rather than text back, I call Brenda and she happily hands over Maggie’s number so I can call her directly.

“I guess it’s about the modelling we discussed?” I say once I’ve noted down the number.

“Yeah, possibly. Although she’s heading away for an Artist in Residence spot, so not sure when she’s planning to fit that in?”

“Oh. Okay, I’ll give her a call and see what she wants. I’m not due in today, but will catch you in the week.” We say goodbye and I hang up.

There’s no time like the present.At least the modelling fee would come in handy if I need to pay a deposit on a new place. I add Maggie’s number to my contacts before pressing the call button.

“Hello, Maggie Sinclair speaking.”

“Hi, Maggie. It’s Alex Campbell from the pottery studio at the Art Centre. Brenda said you wanted to speak to me?”

“Hi, Alex. Thanks for calling. I wanted to run an idea past you.”

“Is it about the modelling? If so, I’m keen.”

“Oh, I’d forgotten all about that, but perhaps that will be a nice little side quest for my other offer. What are your thoughts on Scotland?”

“I’ve never been. I’m sure it’s lovely.”

“Hmmm, and how would you feel about an extended visit?”

I run my hand through my hair, a frown tugging my brows together.What the fuck is she on about?“Well, I don’t really have the funds for a holiday right now. But hopefully, I’ll get to visit soon.”

She chuckles down the line. “I’m heading there next week to start a six-month Artist in Residence placement in Glasgow. I’ve secured funding for an apprentice potter to join me. What do you say?”

“Err, what?” I’m shocked. This is the last thing I expected when I called her. I was convinced I’d be getting my kit off and getting some money for letting people sculpt me.

“I know it’s not much notice, but I only just found out that the position is confirmed. I was so impressed with your work when I met you and I spoke to Brenda, who gave you a glowing recommendation. I’d love to consider you for the position.”

“Wow, I don’t know what to say. This is completely out of the blue.”