Page 54 of Just a Number

Alex asks Zack about his night and they chat while I’m preparing Zack’s food. As I place the full plate in front of him, Alex rises from his seat.

“Thanks for breakfast, Mel. I really appreciate it.”

“Don’t forget your laundry,” Zack tells him, and there’s a tone to his words that I can’t quite decipher. It could be suspicion.Fuck, does he know?

“I’m bringing it over later. I just came over to check it was okay before your mum started work.”

Zack gives him a nod and gets stuck into his food.

Alex approaches the back door and we both realise the same thing at once. The door isn’t yet unlocked. The key is still in the pot on the windowsill where I keep it at night. Alex looks at Zack, who is still busy with his food. Our gazes meet briefly and I give a smile, which could be mistaken for a grimace. He reaches into the pot and carefully lifts them out, trying not to let them rattle in his grasp. I hold my breath. And perhaps it’s that, or the sudden tension in the room, that has Zack lifting his head. There’s nothing I can do to warn Alex as he puts the key in the lock, but Zack watches him closely, with an expression on his face I can’t read.

Chapter twenty-one

Mel

As Alex puts his hand on the handle to open the door and escape, Zack’s voice rings out. “Why was the door locked?”

Alex looks at me and, if we weren’t screwed before, I think it’s that look that seals it.

“What the actual fuck is going on here?” Zack sounds furious.

I close my eyes for a second and draw in a breath.

“Zack, it’s okay,” I say in my most soothing tone. He turns to face me, waiting for an explanation. “Alex, you can go,” I tell him gently.

“Are you sure?” he checks, and Zack huffs when he does.

“Yes, we’re all good. Bring that laundry over whenever you need to.”

“Okay, I’ll catch you both later.” He gives one last glance at me, his brow knitted with worry before he leaves.

“Did you sleep with him?” Zack demands.

“Why do you think that?” I cock my head to the side, trying to buy myself some time to figure out how to get through this with the relationship with my son intact.

“I’ve seen the way he looks at you. And even you look at him funny sometimes, too. So did you?”

I can’t be anything but honest with him. I lean back against the kitchen counter. I’ve been standing, frozen in place, but I try to relax.

“Yes, I did.” It’s hard to watch as his face screws up with disgust.

“Did he take advantage of you?” This might just be the most uncomfortable conversation I’ve ever had with my son, but my heart warms at the thought of him looking out for me.

“No, Zack, of course not. In fact, with the age difference, it’s more likely to be the other way around.”

“How long has it been going on?” His voice is demanding.

“Just last night, and once a couple of weeks ago.”

He fists his hand and holds it to his lips for a moment, as if he’s trying not to lose control. “Wow, you must have been laughing at me, oblivious to what was happening. I only cottoned on because you were both being weird when I arrived.”

“I promise you, Zack, we haven’t been laughing at you. I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

“Why did it have to be one of my friends?” he asks earnestly.

I crumble then, my shoulders caving in as I bow my head as the weight of the guilt and shame I had locked away breaks its way free.

“I didn’t plan it, I swear. We were attracted to each other, and it just happened. I don’t want this to affect your friendship with him.”

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